Bonus Episode 18 – This Counseling Stuff Works
My recovery has many components. Meetings, accountability, working the steps, reaching out to others, and …counseling?
Sexual Purity Support & Recovery Group
By K.LeVeq
Bonus Episode 18 – This Counseling Stuff Works
My recovery has many components. Meetings, accountability, working the steps, reaching out to others, and …counseling?
By Castimonia
This is the finale of the previous two Anakin Skywalker movies, Star Wars: The Fall and Star Wars: Tribulation. One of the most fundamental items to understand about the Star Wars Saga is that it is not just a battle between rebels and an empire, it is all about the redemption of one man, Anakin Skywalker.
The Star Wars Saga was probably one of the best film series ever created and had an amazing recovery theme. Below is a short summary of the overall movie from Wikipedia:
Star Wars is an American epic space opera franchise centered on a film series created by George Lucas. It depicts the adventures of various characters “a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away”, mostly involving, but not limited to, the rise and fall of Anakin Skywalker.
In this final part of the Star Wars Redemption Trilogy, we see Darth Vader continue to struggle with the fact that he has a son and the Emperor (the addiction) wants to cause harm to his son after years of tormenting Darth Vader. Many of us in recovery have felt the Holy Spirit speak to us about our children and the effects that our addiction had on them. For Darth Vader, it is just the same. A struggle continues inside of Darth Vader. He knows he has lost a lot to the Dark Side, his first master, Qui-Gon Jinn murdered by a Sith, his mother, Schmi Skywalker murdered by evil Sand People, and even his wife, Padmé Amedala who dies from a broken heart after Anakin chooses the Dark Side. Now there is a possibility of losing his son Luke to the Dark Side, aka the unhealthy lifestyle. Will he draw the line and say this problem ends with him, or will he allow the addiction to continue and pass on to his son? Can someone so vile and evil be redeemed or is he destined to live a life of anger and rage?
One of the things I explain to my daughters is that my own personal story is a lot like Anakin Skywalker’s. A lot of bad stuff happened to me when I was a child that formed me into an unhealthy individual that made a lot of bad choices. For 30 years, I was involved in unhealthy behaviors. But like Anakin, I was redeemed from my past with the help of the “Son” Jesus Christ and now do good for the Lord. My small children seem to understand this and have compassion on Darth Vader rather than fear him. Maybe we should all have compassion on those that have fallen into the pit. After all, if I, “Darth Vader” can be redeemed than anyone can. I hope you enjoy watching this video as much as I enjoyed creating it. As always, take what you like and leave the rest.
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By Castimonia
Continuing the theme of “300: Rise of an Empire” I found another subtheme in this movie. Although not really impressed with the movie as a whole and how Hollywood has distorted history and also added a completely fabricated and unnecessary sexual scene to this movie, I thought it had some deeper recovery-related gems. For those that don’t know much about this movie (and I don’t expect those early in their recovery to watch the entire movie) here is a summary from Wikipedia:
Based on Frank Miller’s latest graphic novel Xerxes, and told in the breathtaking visual style of the blockbuster “300,” this new chapter of the epic saga takes the action to a fresh battlefield-on the sea-as Greek general Themistocles attempts to unite all of Greece by leading the charge that will change the course of the war. This film pits Themistocles against the massive invading Persian forces led by mortal-turned-god Xerxes, and Artemisia, vengeful commander of the Persian navy.
Nevertheless, in watching this movie, I did pick up on the recovery-related themes. Maybe it was me trying to find some sort of redemptive quality in a poorly made movie, or maybe it was the Holy Spirit saying to me, “use this material, men will ‘listen’ when you speak to them through these films.” I don’t know which one it was, but I’m hoping it was the latter. The second subtheme I saw in this movie is that of a man falling into unhealthy behaviors, admitting his mess, being redeemed as he reenters recovery, and having victory over his addiction (at least for one day). In 300: Rise of an Empire, the leader of the Greek forces, Themistocles, falls into sexual sin with the Persian Naval Commander, Artemisia. He lies about his personal life in order to continue with the acting out (as I did in my former life) and then suffers the consequences of his sexually immoral actions by angering Artemisia and having most of his men killed in battle. Nevertheless, Themistocles admits that he messed up, rallies his troops for one final battle, and “re-enters recovery” by fighting against the “addiction” (portrayed by Artemisia) once again. This movie should be a good reminder to those in recovery that no matter how bad you have messed up, that God can redeem you, but you need to practice rigorous honesty, risking everything, to re-enter recovery. If you slip or relapse, it is important that you are honest about this and not keep it secret. Secrets are what make the addiction thrive, confession is the only way through.
By Castimonia
Originally posted: http://www.cbssports.com/collegebasketball/blog/eye-on-college-basketball/22032475/rick-pitinos-rise-back-to-the-top–
By: Jeff Goodman
College Basketball Insider
ATLANTA — Rick Pitino stood a few feet to the side of the basket, his hand interlocked with his wife Joanne’s. Neither were unable to contain their emotion as One Shining Moment blared throughout the Georgia Dome. This had to be a dream.
Pitino’s marriage nearly fell apart five years ago after he admitted to having sexual relations with another woman and it played out in front of the country, even the world, in the media. There were jokes, there was humiliation. His career seemed over a couple years ago when he was getting annihilated on the court and in recruiting circles by the guy who he couldn’t stand, Kentucky’s John Calipari.
But here he was, hugging and kissing his bride of more than 35 years, in a scene that didn’t look improbable not all that long ago. It looked virtually impossible.
There he was, sitting on the podium exactly one year after Calipari won his first title, becoming the first coach in history to get one with two different schools.
It had been an emotional week, beginning on Wednesday when he almost simultaneously learned that his son, Richard, had accepted the Minnesota job and also that he had been elected to the Hall of Fame. Just following the win Saturday against Wichita State in the national semifinals, Pitino watched the replay of his horse, Goldencents, winning the Santa Anita Derby, thus qualifying for the Kentucky Derby.
Then he cut down the nets on Monday night after Louisville’s 82-76 victory over Michigan in the national title game.
It’s all been against the odds for Pitino, whose life has been a virtual roller-coaster ride over the last couple decades or so. There was the national title in 1996 with Kentucky, then the train wreck three-plus seasons in Boston with the Celtics. He took Louisville to a Final Four, but then came the Sypher mess, in which she tried to extort him and also claimed it was rape.
“We’re a family that’s had a lot of difficult times,” Rick Pitino said.
“Our family has been through a lot,” his son, Richard, added. “But it’s made us stronger. It’s made my dad stronger.”
Pitino has moved past it, but won’t ever forget. He won’t forget his best friend, his brother-in-law Billy Minardi, who died in the World Trade Center attacks back on Sept. 11. He won’t forget about what he did to his family with the Sypher situation. He won’t forget where this program was just a few years ago when everyone had written him off following a 20-13 campaign in which the Cardinals were knocked out of the tournament in the first round.
That’s what makes this so special. That’s what makes this smile so real.
Rick the Ruler is gone. Sure, he still yells and screams at his players, he still makes his assistant coaches make a certain weight. But he’s not the same guy he was the last time he cut down the nets in 1996.
“He’s changed,” Richard Pitino said. “He’s been humbled.”
He had no choice. That’s what nearly losing everything will do to an individual. He nearly lost his family, and nearly watched his career be taken away.
Pitino didn’t take shots at Calipari this season even though he certainly could have done so with that “other” team struggling to an NIT bid. Instead, he elected to take the high road, when that wasn’t always the case in the past. Pitino has grown, as a person and a coach. This group wasn’t nearly as talented as the one in ’96 that was loaded with pros, but it won because the players genuinely bonded with one another and their coach.
Pitino appeared in a state of shock as the clock ticked down and the final buzzer sounded. It was less than three years ago that he was testifying against Sypher, about the same time as Calipari wasn’t just ruling the state of Kentucky, but also ruling the entire college basketball world.
There was no way Pitino would ever be relevant again, not as long as Calipari was breathing in the Commonwealth. A year ago, Calipari took a bunch of heralded recruits and cut down the nets in New Orleans. Pitino also snipped the nets, but he did it by developing and coaching his players. There may not be a single player on this year’s team that gets selected in the first round of June’s NBA Draft. Calipari had four players off last year’s group hear their names uttered in the first round.
Pitino called his entire family up on the makeshift stage in the center of the court moments after the players had finished cutting down the nets. It was time for a photo. Children, grandchildren, nieces and nephews. There were more than 25 people — and every last one of them was smiling.
None more than Joanna Pitino.
“I can’t even put it into words,” she said. “It’s overwhelming.”
The last few years have been overwhelming for the Pitino family. There have been tragedies, humiliation and losses.
But Rick Pitino has somehow managed to overcome it all and wind up back on top.
By Castimonia
Jesus Calling – May 10th
Do not resist or run from the difficulties in your life. These problems are not random mistakes; they are hand-tailored blessings designed for your benefit and growth. Embrace all the circumstances that I allow in your life, trusting Me to bring good out of them. View problems as opportunities to rely more fully on Me.
When you start to feel stressed, let those feelings alert you to your need for Me. Thus, your needs become doorways to deep dependence on Me and increasing intimacy between us. Although self-sufficiency is acclaimed in the world, reliance on Me produces abundant living in My kingdom. Thank Me for the difficulties in your life, since they provide protection from the idolatry of self-reliance.
John 15:5; 2 Corinthians 1:8-9; Ephesians 5:20
This was the devotional read by one of my accountability partners during our most recent accountability meeting. WOW! How amazing is our God, who works all things for our good. This also reminds me of how we define “Joy” at my church. Joy is the steadfast assurance that God is in control.
Sometimes (or a lot of times) in my life, difficulties occur. Prior to entering recovery, I relied only on myself, not on my God! This is the way I grew up, relying only on me, because nobody else was going to watch after me, so I had to do it for myself. Now, as a broken individual working towards wholeness, I must fully rely on God. One of the many blessings from my recovery program is the thought that every single day, I need to be willing to turn my life and will over to the care of God. It doesn’t always happen, from time to time I try to take my will back. However, I acknowledge that I am willing on a daily basis, and my recovery is based on progress, not perfection.
The biggest blessing was when I hit rock bottom. I was desperate, I wanted to run away, I wanted to go home, I wanted to live, I wanted to die. Actually, I was in such turmoil that I didn’t know what I wanted, but God knew what I needed. Again, He used my problems and mistakes to my benefit and growth. I have seen time and time again how when I trust God to the fullest, he pulls me through every single difficulty I have faced and will face. My sponsor always tells me, “it’s going to be OK, and if it’s not, then God is not finished.” Keep in mind that “OK” to God, is not always the same “OK” it is for me. I might not like what God’s version of “OK” is, but I need to keep in mind that it is in my best interest and maintain that “Joy” in my heart. If it took me hitting rock bottom and going through that pain and suffering to bring me closer to God, to help me trust Him, to bring about an intimate connection that I didn’t have before, then it was all worth it and I would do it again.
Take what you like and leave the rest.
References:
John 15:5 – “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.”
2 Corinthians 1:8-9 – 8 We think you ought to know, dear brothers and sisters, about the trouble we went through in the province of Asia. We were crushed and overwhelmed beyond our ability to endure, and we thought we would never live through it. 9 In fact, we expected to die. But as a result, we stopped relying on ourselves and learned to rely only on God, who raises the dead.
Ephesians 5:20 – And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
This site is intended for individuals who struggle with maintaining sexual purity. This information is posted for individuals at various stages in their recovery, year 1 to year 30+; what applies to some, may not apply others. Spouses are encouraged to read this blog with the caveat that they may not agree with, understand, or know the reason for some items posted. As always, take what you like and leave the rest.