Posts Tagged ‘meeting’

by Bevill and Associates

You’ve tried it all. You’ve lectured. You’ve given ultimatums. You’ve staged an intervention. Still, your loved one continues to spiral deeper into drug or alcohol addiction. If you didn’t care about this person so much, you’d have given up long ago. And, as much as you don’t want to give up, it feels like you’ve run out of options.

Before you lose all hope, consider the following suggestions from Rodney Robertson, D.Min., MA, M.Div., family therapist at The Ranch drug rehabilitation center in Tennessee:

#1 Listen more than you talk.

When someone needs help, it’s natural to do a lot of talking — educating, offering guidance and problem-solving. What comes less naturally to most of us is listening.

With someone struggling with addiction and its defense mechanisms like denial, it can be more effective to “listen to what they have to say with empathy so that you understand where they’re coming from,” says Robertson. This way, when you do start talking, there’s a better chance your loved one will feel heard and understood enough to listen.

When it’s time to talk, “be clear and direct, not critical, condemning or judgmental,” says Robertson. The message should be “Im concerned and I want to know if youre concerned too. Can we talk about what it would look like to get help?” You’re not trying to make the decision for them but you want them to realize they can’t do this alone.

#2 Get others involved.

If your loved one wont listen to you, they may be open to hearing the same message from someone else. “This person needs to be someone they trust, not someone you trust,” Robertson warns.

Particularly if the family relationship has been compromised or trust has been eroded, other influences may be able to work with the addicted person to recognize the seriousness of the problem and map out where to go for substance abuse treatment. “As a close relative, you may not be in the best position to help,” says Robertson. “The relationship may be too close and too involved, where its easy to overstep boundaries.”

The best support a loved one can offer, Robertson says, is realizing they can’t heal an addiction. What they can do is help the person struggling with addiction to reach out to others who can treat the illness, such as a support group or therapist.

#3 Step back and allow natural consequences to do their work.

You can’t control another person, and a person struggling with addiction has to take responsibility for their own recovery. Trying to manipulate, bribe or make decisions for someone is a sign of codependency, a condition in which someone is excessively emotionally or psychologically reliant on a loved one struggling with addiction.

“In some cases, loved ones put so much effort into reaching out, convincing and offering help that it can actually prolong the process of going to treatment,” says Robertson. As a result, the addict never feels the full financial, legal and personal consequences of their actions and continues to blame others for their problems.

Stepping back can be the hardest thing to do when someone you love is suffering. It feels neglectful and risky. But the good news is that “when a family member finally lets go and steps back, it doesn’t take long for the addicted person to realize they need help,” says Robertson. “Often, it’s when you back off and the addict is left without support that they come to terms really quickly.” Other influences such as the legal system may be the ones they’ll finally listen to, but for the message to get through, you have to take a step back.

#4 Build your own support network.

Sometimes your concern for your addicted loved one overrides your concern for yourself. Although understandable, this approach depletes you and focuses your attention on things that are beyond your control. “Take heart that you’re doing what you can and then take care of yourself and your needs,” says Robertson. Turn to people who love and support you, including friends, family, a therapist, a support group like Al-Anon and other parents in similar situations.

Sometimes the most powerful steps you can take are the ones that, to an outside observer, may look like giving up. But what you’re really doing is giving your addicted loved one a chance to see what their life has become and discover their motivation for getting better. Addiction took them away, but they aren’t gone forever — treatment can help bring them back.

By Meghan Vivo

… and this is a GREAT thing!  THIS is what church should be but many are too concerned with production value and broadcasting of the services and fail to be “real” when it comes to spreading the Gospel, the dirty, beautiful Gospel of Jesus Christ and His power of redemption.  It “falls short” because it is not trying to live up to the production standards of some of the churches in the area who pride themselves on “entertainment” rather than spreading the message of God’s love and our redemption.

Come worship God with other broken individuals

Those of us in recovery will sometimes walk into our church service thinking that others are looking at us with downcast eyes; Pharisees? This is especially true early on in recovery when we have just been “found out” or rumors spread of our marital or personal problems.  We fear that these “normal” people are without addictions or compulsions and look down upon us that struggle with these issues.  We feel that the people in this room have never committed adultery, been black-out drunk, or used illegal drugs.  We fear that these people have never sinned; at least not like us.  This, of course, is not the case at a Prodigals service.  Those that attend this service are all broken, are all sinners, and are all loved by God.  This is because we are not blind to the fact that we are sinful and selfish people. For most of us attending this service, the 12 Steps have taught us this about ourselves; we are no longer blind.  Performing a deep and thorough inventory of who we really are has enlightened us of our character and leaves us with no choice but to turn to Jesus and His power to set us free.

The message at Prodigals is largely Recovery-based

The setting is fantastic, intimate and inviting.  The worship music is tailored to resonate with addicts and the broken.  It cuts to the core of our want and need for redemption and our cry out to the Lord to heal us from our affliction; to free us from our self-imposed bondage.  Freedom.  Along with the praise and worship music, a testimony is given in this service which adds to the welcoming environment needed by those of us in recovery.  We feel like we are not alone after hearing a testimony to which we can relate.  The short but effective sermon is one that we can also relate to.  It typically includes recovery-related themes with recovery-related language.  It also is raw, unblemished, and truthful.  They are not afraid to share of their brokenness or of their addiction.  They are not afraid to speak truth to those of us who are listening.  And they rejoice at having been restored from a life of addiction and compulsion to where the Lord can now use them for His good purpose.

If you are in any recovery program and feel like you don’t “fit in” at your church, I encourage you to visit the Prodigals service and see for yourself how powerful the experience can be worshiping the Lord with other recovery individuals.  Even if you are comfortable at your own church like I am, visit the Prodigals and experience a different side of praise and worship and the Word of God with your fellow recovering members.  Experience hope! It is an experience you won’t soon forget.

Prodigals information is written below:

Location: Loft Worship, Student Building of The Fellowship
Date: Every Saturday Evening
Time: 5:30PM



Here is some information on the retreat.  I pray that the Lord uses this retreat to help men in their sexual purity journey.  The link to register for the retreat will be available later this Summer.

Friday, November 3rd – Sunday, November 5th

Castimonia’s Paratus Retreat is a retreat for any man who struggles with any type of sexual purity.  Paratus is Latin for equipped.

If you are wondering about whether to attend this retreat, ask yourself these questions:

  • Are you fully equipped for the spiritual battle that is raging around us right now?
  • Are you a man who strives for biblical sexual purity?
  • Are you a man who struggles with maintaining that sexual purity?
  • Do you want a circle of brothers helping you in your sexual purity journey?

Join us for a weekend dedicated to equipping adult men of all ages, all walks of life, and various levels of struggle with the tools necessary to wage this spiritual battle and emerge on the other side as the sexually pure men that God intended us to be.

At the retreat, we will discuss strategies for equipping ourselves with tactics necessary for battling the enemy. We will discover the true meaning of brotherhood and fellowship. The leaders of the retreat will set the example of vulnerability and accountability. We hope to pave the way for all men to be fully equipped to wage war against Satan’s tempting assaults and emerge VICTORIOUS.

Early Bird Registration up until September 15 – $175

Regular Registration after September 15 – November 1st – $200

Due to the unfortunate case that our host church Cinco Ranch Church of Christ flooded during Hurricane Harvey we will not be able to use this location for the next few months.  However, another church has stepped forward to allow us to use their location for our Tuesday night Castimonia meeting.  This will be a temporary move and as soon as CRCOC is operational, we can move the meeting back.  Please join me in praying for CRCOC as they clean out and rebuild damaged areas and please contact this ministry if you can help with this effort and we will put you in contact with the individual who oversees this meeting.

Temporary meeting location starting Tuesday, September 12th:

Trinity Baptist Church
10000 Spring Green Blvd.
Katy, TX  77494

We will not be meeting tomorrow night at The Fellowship as our host church is Harvey relocation central for Katy and it is Labor Day. We plan to resume the following Monday night. 

If you need a meeting tomorrow night, please visit the Life Path location below. 

Monday Nights
Time: 7:00PM – 8:30PM
Location: Lifepath Church – Room 108
17703 W Little York Rd
Houston, TX 77084
Contact: Jeremy P. at 281.794.9355 or

We WILL be meeting this morning at The Fellowship. We will be UPSTAIRS in the Prayer Room of the same building as the Community Room where we normally meet. 

We are grateful to announce that tonight’s Pearland meeting will be held at its usual time and location! Please visit this meeting if you need to. Please stay safe! 

Thursday Nights
Time: 7:00PM – 8:30PM
Location: St. Andrews Episcopal Church
Room 106
2535 E. Broadway St.
Pearland, TX  77581
Contact: Mitch at