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Sexual Purity Support & Recovery Group

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March 21, 2023 By Castimonia

NEW STEP GROUP – Starting May 13th!

Our founder, Jorge, will be leading a new step study group starting May 13th.  This is his 6th Step group.

The group lasts for about 2 years and you will go through all the steps including the pre-step and post-step work in the Castimonia book. 

They will meet every 2 weeks on Saturday mornings from 800am to 955am before the 10am Saturday Castimonia meeting in Katy. There is no cost to join the group but you must purchase a copy of the Castimonia book, 2nd edition.  Out of town guests will be able to use Zoom to join the group if they cannot attend in person. Houston-area members will need to attend in person.

This group takes a strong, long term commitment and is great for those ready to work the steps and have the Lord change their lives.

Please have any interested individuals contact Jorge at jorge@castimonia.org.

Filed Under: General Meeting Information, Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, castimonia, porn, pornography, recovery, Sex, sex addiction, sexual, sexual purity

March 13, 2023 By Castimonia

The Perfect Step

Originally posted at: http://theresstillhope.org

“We admitted that we were powerless over alcohol, that our lives had become unmanageable.” 
        – Step 1, Alcoholics Anonymous

Recovery begins where control ends. We must accept the fact that we have a problem.

Marsha Linehan said it well. “Radical acceptance rests on letting go of the illusion of control and a willingness to notice and accept things as they are right now.” 

Step 1 is the only Step you have to work perfectly. Until you recognize that (a) you have a problem, and (b) you can’t do anything about it, you will never know recovery. 

Recovery Step: The psalmist said, “I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me” (Psalm 51:3). Say it with me: “I am powerless. God has all power. I will trust him now.”

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, porn, pornography, recovery, Sex, sex addiction, sexual, sexual purity

March 9, 2023 By Castimonia

The Beatitudes: A Path to Discipleship

Although this is taken from a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, it has some good recovery information incorporating the 12 steps. Take what you like and leave the rest.

Matthew 5; Luke 6

The Sermon on the Mount opens with the Beatitudes. The term “beatitudes” is taken from the Latin Vulgate for “blessed are” or beati sunt.[i] In Hebrew, the word blessed is ashrei (oshray) or ‘esher which means “O, the happiness of.”[ii] So Christ teaches that as we develop attributes of mercy, meekness and purity we will become happier. Yet his teachings hold a much deeper meaning.

The early Christian/Jewish scholar, Alfred Edersheim, stated the relationship between the initial state and the promise is not merely a reward for the other. “The connecting link…is in each case Christ Himself.”[iii] How like the Book of Mormon account of Christ giving the beatitudes to the people in the new world where the first beatitude adds “Blessed is the poor who come unto me” [iv] It is clear by learning this attribute through following the words of Christ as guided by the Holy Ghost that we are bestowed with the promised blessing.

Another point made by Edersheim was the beatitudes were presented “successively, progressively and extensively.”[v] They reflect a process to heal, repent, and draw closer to Christ.

Many have compared the beatitudes to the “12 Step” program of Alcoholics Anonymous and the foundation for the church’s Addiction Recovery Program. In the 1930’s, a man named Bill Wilson developed the twelve steps through experience and inspiration in turning to God. Although he did not use the beatitudes per se, comparing these steps to Matthew 5:3-12 shows how remarkably similar they are.

The Beatitudes and the 12 Steps

 Blessed are the poor in spirit,

    for theirs in the kingdom of heaven.

Note: The first beatitude may be about each of us recognizing our own deficits or those places our spirits are poor or lacking. What do we need to improve or change? What do we need to repent of?  When we realize or own weaknesses and turn to Christ, only then are we actually using the gifts of insight and strength he has given us through his gospel. This attitude is reflected in the first three of the twelve steps.

  1. We admit we were powerless over our addiction.
  2. Come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
  3. Decide to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

Blessed are those who mourn,

    for they will be comforted.

Note: Much like mourning the death of a loved one, we must mourn over our own sin and the death of our natural man. Unlike earthly sorrow at being “caught’, we must begin with godly sorrow as Paul taught, “For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death.”[vi] One of the hardest of the twelve steps is looking clearly at who we are and what we need to let go of.

  1. Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Blessed are the meek,

    for they will inherit the earth.

Note:  Elder Bednar said that being meek includes learning both from the Holy Ghost and from people who may seem less capable, experienced, or educated. He also says that meekness is “the principal protection from the prideful blindness that often arises from prominence, position and power.” [vii] How like this apostle’s explanation of meekness is the next step on the path to recovery.

  1. Admit to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,

     for they shall be filled with the Holy Ghost[viii]

Note: As we receive the Holy Ghost, we become sanctified of our sins.[ix] It is only through this great gift of the Spirit, through the grace of Christ that this is made possible. As with the evil spirit that the disciples could not cleanse, but had to be removed by the Savior himself, some of our own weaknesses “goeth not out but by prayer and fasting.”[x] This humble reaching for additional help and healing is reflected in the next two steps.

  1. Be entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
  2. Humbly ask Him to remove our shortcomings.

Blessed are the merciful,

     for they will be shown mercy.

Note: Having mercy is all about forgiving both ourselves and others.  Elder Uchtdorf said, “Of all the people in the world, the one who is the hardest to forgive… is the person looking back at us in the mirror.”[xi] As we work to make amends and be worthy of forgiveness, we can more easily feel able to forgive ourselves. This seems the reasoning behind the next step.

  • Made a list of all persons we had harmed and become willing to make amends to them all.

Blessed are the peacemakers,

     for they will be called children of God. 

Note: Pres. Nelson has said, “Peace can prevail only when the natural inclination to fight is superseded by self-determination to live on a loftier level.” [xii]  Living on this loftier level, takes thought and planning like the next step.

  1. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when doing so would injure them or others.

Blessed are the pure of heart,

     for they will see God.

Note: We know that “… this is Zion—the pure in heart.”[xiii] Those that follow this path of Christ’s and this similar addiction recovery plan become purer. But as we know after a shower, the cleaning only lasts so long. In the gospel, we weekly renew our baptismal covenants as a type of weekly “spiritual” bath or shower. In the same way, taking consistent personal inventories allows individuals not to slip back into old habits.   

  1. Continue to take personal inventory and when we are wrong promptly admit it.
  2. Seek through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understand Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,

    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Note: Finally, having found the truth and becoming free of the addictions that hold us back, we have a responsibility to share that truth with others struggling. Inevitably when we do this, those not ready to listen will grow angry at our efforts. Persecution can be a result, and it is easy to turn the tables and reflect that anger to others. Elder Renlund recently said, “Persecution comes in many forms: ridicule, harassment, bullying, exclusion and isolation, or hatred toward another…We must not be guilty of persecuting anyone inside or outside the Church.”[xiv]

  1. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in our affairs.

Utilizing the beatitudes not only for their individual truths, but as a process can help us to move forward in our efforts to become nearer to Jesus. Elder Meredith of the seventy recently said, “There is no discipleship without discipline.”[xv] The beatitudes could be called the path to discipleship and having written this, I know I need to walk that path more often.

Thanks to http://www.grainofwheat.ca/the-beatitudes-and-the-12-step/

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, porn, pornography, recovery, Sex, sex addiction, sexual, sexual purity

March 5, 2023 By Castimonia

9 Subtle “Addictions” You Must Break to Become Your Most Authentic and Successful Self

Although Addictions are more serious than what this writer states, this is great information for any addict or non addict.

Are you feeling stuck and unfulfilled in your personal or professional life? Do you find yourself struggling with subtle addictions that may be holding you back from reaching your full potential? From social media addiction to people-pleasing, these subtle addictions can be hard to spot, yet they have a significant impact on our happiness and success. In this post, we will explore 9 subtle addictions that you must break if you want to become your most authentic and successful self. Get ready to take control of your life and unlock your full potential by breaking free from these unhealthy habits and mindsets.

1. Social media addiction

Social media addiction is a subtle addiction that affects millions of people worldwide. It involves the compulsive use of social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok, among others. This addiction can lead to an unhealthy need for validation, anxiety, and a distorted sense of reality. To break free from social media addiction, you can start by setting time limits on your usage, taking breaks from social media, and practicing mindfulness and self-awareness.

“Social media is a tool, not a lifestyle.” – UnknownThis quote reminds us that while social media can be useful for connecting with others and sharing our lives, it should not consume our entire existence. We should use it mindfully and in moderation, rather than letting it control our thoughts and behaviors.

2. Procrastination addiction

Procrastination is the act of putting off tasks until the last minute or not doing them at all. It can be caused by fear of failure, lack of motivation, or overwhelm. To overcome procrastination addiction, you need to develop a habit of setting goals, creating a schedule, breaking tasks into smaller, more manageable chunks, and developing a positive mindset.

“Procrastination is the thief of time.” – Edward YoungThis quote emphasizes the negative impact of procrastination on our productivity and success. When we procrastinate, we waste valuable time that could be spent on more important or fulfilling tasks. It’s a reminder that overcoming procrastination is essential for achieving our goals and living a fulfilling life.

3. Perfectionism addiction

Perfectionism is the obsessive need to be flawless and perfect in all aspects of life. It can lead to anxiety, low self-esteem, and burnout. To break free from perfectionism addiction, you need to learn to accept mistakes as part of the learning process, set realistic expectations, and focus on progress rather than perfection.

“Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection we can catch excellence.” – Vince LombardiThis quote acknowledges the unrealistic nature of perfectionism, while also highlighting the importance of striving for excellence. It’s a reminder that seeking perfection can be a trap that prevents us from taking action or moving forward, while focusing on excellence can help us make progress and achieve our goals.

4. Approval addiction

Approval addiction is the constant need for validation and acceptance from others. It can lead to people-pleasing behaviors, low self-esteem, and a lack of confidence. To overcome approval addiction, you need to focus on building a strong sense of self-worth, setting boundaries, and learning to trust your intuition.

5. Control addiction

Control addiction is the need to control everything around you, including people, situations, and outcomes. It can lead to anxiety, stress, and a lack of trust in others. To overcome control addiction, you need to practice letting go, embracing uncertainty, and developing a sense of faith and trust in yourself and others.

6. Comparison addiction

Comparison addiction is the habit of comparing oneself to others, often leading to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem. To break free from comparison addiction, you need to focus on your own journey, develop a sense of gratitude, and practice self-compassion.

7. Work addiction

Work addiction is the obsessive need to work all the time, often at the expense of one’s health, relationships, and personal life. To overcome work addiction, you need to set clear boundaries between work and personal life, take breaks, and prioritize self-care.

8. People-pleasing addiction

People-pleasing addiction is the habit of always putting other people’s needs and desires before your own, often at the expense of your own well-being. To overcome people-pleasing addiction, you need to practice setting boundaries, saying “no” when necessary, and prioritizing self-care.

9. Victimhood addiction

Victimhood addiction is the habit of seeing oneself as a victim, often blaming others for one’s problems and failures. To break free from victimhood addiction, you need to take responsibility for your own life, develop a positive mindset, and focus on solutions rather than problems.

In summary, breaking free from subtle addictions is crucial for personal growth and success. By recognizing and overcoming harmful habits like social media addiction, procrastination addiction, and perfectionism addiction, we can create space for positive experiences in our lives and unlock our full potential. Remember, the journey towards personal growth is ongoing, and every step forward is a step in the right direction.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, porn, recovery, Sex, sexual

March 1, 2023 By Castimonia

Pastors & Porn

Originally posted at: https://prevailingwordministries.wordpress.com/2023/02/21/pastors-porn/

According to the recoveryvillage.com site, “40 million U.S. adults regularly visit internet pornography websites. 10% of U.S. adults admit to having an addiction to internet pornography. 17% of all women struggle with porn addiction. 20% of men and 13% of women admit to accessing porn while at work. Sep 13, 2022″

Covenanteyes.com says “It’s projected that virtual reality (VR) porn should be a $1 billion business by the year 2025. That’s third behind an expected $1.4 billion virtual reality video game market and $1.23 billion VR NFL-related content.”

This is a significant problem.

Whenever there’s new technology, the porn industry looks to exploit the technology because money is involved.

The southern border in the United States isn’t just an opioid/fentanyl situation. Human trafficking for the sex trade whether prostitutes, adult film, pedophilia, or sodomy is on going.

To close the border, it wouldn’t stop the trade as there would be other ways to exploit.

As usual, believers and pastors are in the mix.

Again, according to Covenanteyes.com “1 in 5 youth pastors and 1 in 7 senior pastors use porn on a regular basis and currently struggling. That’s more than 50,000 U.S. church leaders.

43% of senior pastors and youth pastors say they have struggled with pornography in the past.

64% of Christian men and 15% of Christian women say they watch porn at least once a month.

Only 7% of pastors report their church has a ministry program for those struggling with porn.

There’s 330,000 Protestant Churches in the United States. For 43% of senior pastors to struggle with porn, this is roughly (I could be wrong), 120,000 to 140,000 senior pastors.

Because 50% of 330,000 is 165,000.

No one watches porn without masturbation to release sexual tension. Or for men and women to release sexual tension other than their wives or husbands, they’ll seek hotels, church members, male or female, or prostitutes.

Sexual immorality is a real issue and satan will not stop.

Pornography is a major stronghold in the world and as long as there’s an audience, the chains remain.

Which means that you may be in a church where porn is a regular mainstay with a pastor. It’s no wonder why there’s such a fight not to repent of sexual sins in the preachers. Because if the preachers, entrusted with living holy and giving the Word of God is to live blameless lives, can’t live holy lives, just imagine what’s going on in the pews.

It’s no wonder that when holiness is preached, people make for the exits.

Sexual immorality is the one stronghold that Satan will fight to keep because if he could keep a church from being effective, then the gospel will be of no effect.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, porn, pornography, recovery, Sex, sex addiction, sexual, sexual purity

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This site is intended for individuals who struggle with maintaining sexual purity. This information is posted for individuals at various stages in their recovery, year 1 to year 30+; what applies to some, may not apply others. Spouses are encouraged to read this blog with the caveat that they may not agree with, understand, or know the reason for some items posted. As always, take what you like and leave the rest.

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