Posts Tagged ‘affair’


His name means: “Troublemaker”

His character: Achan’s greed for the spoils of war and his attempt to hide his sin led to a situation that endangered Israel’s relationship with God. By disregarding God’s command, he brought trouble and judgment on his own people. His sorrow: His disobedience resulted in the loss of many lives, including his own. His triumph: To have participated in the victory over Jericho. Key Scriptures: Joshua 7:1-8:2

A Look at the Man

Achan may not have been a bad man, at least to begin with. While living for many years in the desert, he may even have fed himself on dreams of what life would be like in the Promised Land, where he could build a life for his family. He may have rushed into Jericho fully intending to follow the Lord’s commands. But then came an opportunity to do otherwise. And that’s when his resolve faded.

Achan’s disobedience then produced a kind of foolishness in him; he attempted to hide what he had done, burying stolen goods beneath his tent. But he was hiding from the God who made him, from the same God who parted the Red Sea and the Jordan River, and from the God who had just caused the walls of a fortified city to crumble without a weapon being raised against it. Why was Achan foolish enough to think that God would find it hard to see through his little deception?

The truth is that it’s sin’s nature to hide. Consider your own experience. Isn’t it hard to admit your sins to others? Isn’t it difficult to admit them to yourself? Most of us have found ingenious ways to hide the ugliness of sin from ourselves and others, by rationalizing, excusing, and even forgetting things we’ve done wrong. But Achan’s story tells us that God is never fooled by such foolishness.

Simple obedience and the cleansing power of God’s grace are the best defense against sin. But when we fail to do the right thing, we should remind ourselves not to compound the problem by hiding what we’ve done. Instead, we can go directly to God, expressing our sorrow and asking his forgiveness, confident that he will give it.

Reflect On: Deuteronomy 6:1–3 Praise God: Because his commandments are meant to bless us, not to enslave us. Offer Thanks: That God has not hidden his commands from us. Confess: Any tendency to value your opinion about a course of action more than you value God’s. Ask God: To make you humble enough to realize that you do not always know what is best.

Today’s reading is a brief excerpt from Men of the Bible: A One-Year Devotional Study of Men in Scripture by Ann Spangler and Robert Wolgemuth (Zondervan). © 2010 by Ann Spangler. Used with permission. All rights reserved. Enjoy the complete book by purchasing your own copy at the Bible Gateway Store. The book’s title must be included when sharing the above content on social media.

A benefit of seeking a life of rigorous honesty is that I don’t have anything to hide. I no longer spend my days trying to remember what story I told to whom. I don’t parse my words when I talk to my wife about my day, trying to avoid discussing how I truly spent my time. I don’t say “fine” when others ask me how I am doing or how I am feeling. Honesty is new for me. It is also very freeing.

I am participating in a men’s Bible study through my church. We are studying a book by Louie Giglio called Goliath Must Fall. I really like his style of writing, how he is very transparent about his struggles and his failures. The premise is that Christ already has victory over the “giants” in our lives and therefore we can claim that victory and not allow them to have a foothold. Last night’s lesson was on fear. I was sure I had this one whipped. I don’t have anything to hide anymore so therefore I don’t have anything to fear.

The author spoke about his relationship with his father and how something small his father said to him had such a lasting impact. A throwaway sarcastic comment where both of them laughed at the expense of the son seemed innocuous to the father but was so damaging to the son. The son didn’t recognize at the time that his father was the product of an environment where rejection was constant and present. Not until at the end of the father’s life did the son realize that his father had experienced nothing but rejection and that he constantly tried to give acceptance to his son but didn’t always succeed.

My father is dying. He is gradually slipping away. He has fought against a neuromuscular disease for the last twenty years. He is strong and determined. He is losing. He is also losing his memory. The dementia is impacting his ability to function on a daily basis. The struggle to care for him is draining my mother both physically and mentally.

I realized this last week when visiting my father that I have pent up resentment and animosity towards he and my mother for the rejection I felt throughout most of my life, not only for what they said but for what they didn’t say. The times I hoped to hear them tell me they were proud of me or that what I did and wanted was important. I allowed that rejection to have a foothold. I realized that when I was visiting with them. They both came from difficult circumstances. I realized that, too. My animosity and resentment has started to truly melt away.

In our study this week, I was dwelling on this resentment and animosity that Louie Giglio had for his father. I thought about the animosity and anger I had towards my father. Then I realized that even though I was letting go of that foothold in my life, I had one more.

Reviewing fear forced me to look deeper into my life. I realize that I have a deep seated fear. I am afraid that I have damaged my kids too much. I fear they won’t be able to see me as a “good” father. I fear my wife won’t ever be able to trust me again. I realize that I can only do what my father does for me now. Each time I see him he tells me how much he loves me and that he doesn’t want me to leave. I pray that God show me that He has conquered these fears as well.

One of the greatest myths that is pervasive in our culture today is that you are entitled to a great life and that somehow, somewhere, someone is responsible for filling our lives with continual happiness, exciting career options, nurturing family time and blissful personal relationships simply because we exist. But the real truth is that there is only one person responsible for the quality of the life you live. That person is you.

Everything about you is a result of your doing or not doing. Income. Debt. Relationships. Health. Fitness level. Attitudes and behaviors. That person who reflects back at you in the mirror is the chief conductor in your life. Say hello!

I think everyone knows this in their hearts, but the mind can play games, tricking plenty of people into thinking external factors are the source of failure, disappointment, and unhappiness. But the truth of the matter is that external factors don’t determine how you live. You are in complete control of the quality of your life.

Successful people take full responsibility for the thoughts they think, the images they visualize, and the actions they take. They don’t waste their time and energy blaming and complaining. They evaluate their experiences and decide if they need to change them or not. They face the uncomfortable and take risks in order to create the life they want to live.

You cannot borrow half
of who you are
from someone else,
yet people try to do it
all of the time,
they just call it
a relationship!
Jennifer O’Neill,

Step Four means looking deep into me. Way deeper than I ever imagined.


Even when the rain falls
Even when the flood starts rising
‘Cause even when the storm comes
I am washed by the water

“Washed by the Water”NEEDTOBREATHE

It is like a person building a house who digs deep and lays the foundation on solid rock. When the floodwaters rise and break against that house, it stands firm because it is well built. – Luke 6:48 (NLT)

I apologize now for the analogy, but it is Jesus who used it, not me. In Luke chapter 6, Christ talks about our foundations. He specifically mentions digging deep to lay a foundation on solid rock. I was at a men’s meeting this week. The speaker, a man I know in recovery, was speaking primarily to an audience of about seventy men about digging deep. He referenced Luke 6:48 as to why its important to lay a foundation on solid rock.

I really liked how he focused on what you do before you lay a foundation. You dig deep. Much like many of us have been doing during this time after a catastrophe. We have physically been helping others or ourselves dig deep to clean out all of the junk before we rebuild on a solid foundation. We have emptied out the ruin from houses, saturated and mildewed by the flood and the storm. So we can prepare for the next storm.

Just before verse 48, as I look back into Luke, Jesus was making a point. He was giving an example of what it looks like when someone comes to Him, listens to His teaching, and then follows it. They dig deep, clean up their mess, build on a solid foundation. Verse 49 describes what happens when someone builds with no foundation. When they are self sufficient. When the storms come, they can’t handle them and are washed away.

Most of my life I have been self sufficient. I thought I could handle the storms. I hoped that none would come and I would acted surprised when they did. I missed the points Christ made. I missed that He didn’t say “if” the floods of life come. He said “when” the floods of life come. I missed that he instructed us to dig deep, find a firm foundation. I came to Him, I just didn’t do the rest. I didn’t listen to His teaching and make it my life’s work. I didn’t have a firm foundation. Then the storms came, the flood waters rose, and I was washed away. Every time.

I seek daily now to implement the directions Christ gave us in Luke 6. Each day I come to Him through prayer, Bible study, and fellowship with my brothers in Christ. I listen to His teaching through studying His word and seeking direction from His teachers. I try to follow it daily. I am broken in a broken world. I have to daily dig deep and clean out my house and reset my foundation. My foundation is able and strong. Even though I am not.

Jorge and Doug discuss the practical steps in working Step 6.  How do we take ownership in our recovery and still step aside for God to heal us?  What does that look like?

This is a difficult step, and it marks a major shift in our recovery as we now are taking ownership and creating more confidence in our sobriety.

Email us at for more information.  And remember you are not on this journey alone!

Keith B – Not Unknown

First, I hope all of you are surviving this difficult time in Houston. I know I don’t have to describe to any of you the stress, anxiety, turmoil that is present in all of our lives right now. This is one of the few times I can use you and we statements to describe the impacts of Harvey on all of our lives and our homes. Whether you have a worst case scenario or you have just been riding out the after effects, we all are balancing the conflicting and overwhelming emotions that have hit us, our families, friends, workplaces. I know one thing and one thing only in this time…He is faithful, even when I am not.

The stress and anxiety started for me personally last week, when I returned to work after a few days off to take my son to college and to care for my dad who is in hospice care in my home state. I got back to work last Monday and started the process of trying to catch up. That’s when my boss came to meet with me and let me know that she had decided that I wasn’t really a good fit for the organization and that she had determined that the company would be separating me. Welcome back!

I wish I could say I was surprised and caught off guard but I really wasn’t. I knew that my working relationship with her wasn’t going well. It wasn’t. It hadn’t since I started about 18 months ago. My first few months there were different from my last year. Because for the last year I have been in recovery. My attitude and focus on work has changed. I started approaching my work and my relationships at work much differently. Specifically, I determined to be rigorously honest, only focused on work when I was at work, and not try to manipulate or lie to anyone. Unfortunately, that had been my primary work mode in the past…lying and manipulating wherever I could for my own benefit.

I found that my work relationship with my boss didn’t improve, despite what I knew to be a change in my working behavior. I came to finally understand that I could only change my own behavior, focus on my own faults and character defects. I realize now that I previously believed that my boss and past bosses didn’t have the same type of issues that I had. That somehow they were fair, truthful and above reproach.

I look now at how I have worked over the past year. I can clearly say that I wasn’t perfect. I can clearly and honestly say that I was transparent, and open, and rigorously honest, and not manipulative. I did good work. I did the best I could. The hard part is it wasn’t enough to remain there, because that isn’t where God intends me to be. I don’t like that, not being in control of my own career and work. But that is how God wants me to be…dependent on him for everything. Turning my life and will over to the care of God…all of it. I haven’t done that yet. Not all of it…but I am moving toward Him. Not away.

I was texting my friend in recovery who had to evacuate his house. Something struck me that he said to me as he asked me and others for help. He said he was thankful that he was in recovery because prior to that he wouldn’t have asked for help. That rings true to me as well. Prior to recovery I would not have openly sought help and guidance for my next steps in my career. Now I am seeking help and guidance from God and the people He has put in my life.