by Brad Andres
– You’re past the point of denial. You’ve moved into reality. It’s here; It’s real – You’re addicted to pornography.
“I can stop anytime I want,” you say to yourself, “I’m not addicted.”
– Is that so? Stop watching porn then…
“Well, it’s just not that easy…”
– Yep. That’s because your addicted.
“No I’m not.”
– Well now you’ve fallen back into denial. Let’s just assume you’re addicted and move on past this vicious circle.
Levels of Addiction
I think most people tend to view addiction as an uncontrollable, unquenchable desire. Addiction can be defined as a habit (in this case – watching pornography) which has become compulsive and enslaving. In some ways, this inner desire controls you. You are not controlling it. So it’s not unquenchable, because you have beat it before. But it is an addiction – you keep falling back to it.
So whether you watch porn daily, weekly, or once a month – when you lose the battle against it (multiple times), you’re addicted.
You need to realize the root of the addiction:
This is physical – Masturbation feels good. This is psychological – Our brains release chemicals and all this other fun stuff happens when we watch porn. It’s not simply because then women are so hot. This is spiritual – You’ve given a piece of yourself away when you masturbate to pornography.
Watching pornography is a sinful habit. It can be defeated.
Let’s Fight
Discipline – The best fighters are well disciplined.
I think of coach Boone in Remember the Titans:
“I don’t scratch my head unless it itches…”
We realize the discipline it takes to hit the gym everyday as a professional boxer. In addition, they need to eat right, sleep right, and rest right. Also, they need the discipline to know when to take a punch, when to dodge a blow, etc. All this takes discipline. If it were easy – there would be a lot more professional boxers.
Self-discipline is a staple for overcoming the drive and desire for watching porn. However, self-discipline isn’t something you can switch on and off at will. Self-discipline is a lifestyle. It is a habit.
So you’re gonna need to train – to fight. Practice doing things that your body works against. If you don’t work out – start. Do it because you need to develop self-discipline to do the things your body doesn’t want to do. Other practices to help you in your training:
You’re gonna need to start eating right
The better you are physically, the more stamina you’ll have in fighting off these desires. Let’s be real, many times the desire to check out the website comes when you’re tired, stressed, or upset.
You’re gonna need to sleep right
Again the better shape you are physically, the easier you’ll be able to ward off attacks instead of giving in. Get yourself a good eight hours.
You’re gonna want to start fasting
This will teach you spiritual discipline and give you mastery over your body. Your desires do not rule you – you are the commander of your body.
You’re gonna want to start praying
This is a spiritual battle, and you’re not gonna be able to beat it on your own.
You’re gonna want to starve yourself of all sexual content
No TV shows with sex scenes or sexual innuendos. No movies with any sort of promiscuous sexual content. Make yourself look away from the Victoria Secret posters when walking through the mall. No watching movies with the celebrities you used to look up on the Internet.
You’re gonna want to find an accountability partner
Yes you will answer to God, but that time is so far removed from now (in our minds anyway), that it normally doesn’t impact behavior. If your friend or mentor is calling (or texting) at 8 pm each night to follow up with you, it impacts your behavior because it’s much more immediate.
If you have integrity you’ll be fine, man up and tell him you failed, ask for prayer, and tomorrow is a new day. If you lie, you’re never going to beat the porn addiction until you stop lying. It’s easier to simply say a lie than to physically act against your body’s desires.
By the way, I feel it is important to let you know this isn’t theoretical knowledge. I’ve been there, I was addicted, and with God’s help – that addiction was broken.