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Effects of Childhood Sexual Abuse, Part 3

Effects of abuse, part 3
By Paul Irby Special to the Abilenian
Abilene Reporter-News
Posted February 4, 2009 at 1:08 p.m.

This third article in the series of six reflects what can be called a continuation of a chain reaction beginning with the cognitive impacts discussed last month, which lead to the emotional experiences discussed in this article. The most common emotional experiences a sexually abused child encounters include fear, anxiety, anger, guilt and shame.

Fear and anxiety are closely related emotions. Many of their physiological and psychological experiences are identical. Fears and anxieties experienced by an abused child can be specific to gender, age range, status or race. When these fears are category-specific it is most likely tied to associations with the abuser. Fears and anxieties can also be more broad and general. Common generalized fears of abused children include the fear of their secret being found out, being rejected by peers and being emotionally vulnerable which would ultimately lead to being betrayed by someone else.

I recall working with a 23-year-old man who had been sexually abused by his mother from the age of 6 until the age of 21. One of the main reasons for his desire to seek therapy was “feeling angry all the time.”

I explained to my client that when I hear someone make such an assertion that my mind immediately returns to what I know to be the nature of anger. Anger is a secondary emotion. Quite literally, what that means is that anger is what we feel second in the sequence of emotional experience. Most often what is felt first is some kind of fear. This is only true of genuine anger, not frustration or irritation.

Think back to your own experience of being cut off in traffic. We can easily identify the feelings of anger toward that driver and our subsequent desires to express that anger. If someone were to ask you how you felt after being cut off, you would probably frame this experience as one that prompted anger. However, if we were to trace back the very first emotional experience, it would be one of fear. For the driver, it is the fear that the vehicle or self might be hurt, and the fear quickly manifests itself into anger. So, when I heard my client contend that he was “angry all the time,” we began a discussion of what fears are present that lead to his consistent feelings of anger. In reality one who has been abused, who walks around angry “all the time,” is living with pervasive fear. Anger was the way in which this person chose to protect himself from the fears becoming a reality.

Guilt and shame are often used interchangeably in our language, but an important distinction was made to me by one of my wise clients. He defined guilt as “believing you did something bad” and shame as “believing you are a bad person.” When considered in the framework of one who was sexually abused as a child, this is one of the biggest lies he or she can believe. While much of our society can look from the outside in to another’s experience and logically make a case finding fault in the abused child’s reactions or responses, these outsiders are wrong. Often they will say things like, “well you shouldn’t have kept it a secret so long,” not recognizing the power of intimidation, fear and humiliation that maintains the secret. Abusers use sick “logic” to rationalize abuse, claiming that the child “flirted” with them or “wanted it as much as they did.” These abusers fail to recognize their humane responsibility as adults to the welfare of children, and often confuse affection for sexual advancement.

Survivors of abuse will internalize these inaccurate beliefs that result in feelings of guilt and shame. Children should never be blamed for abuse perpetrated against them.

Paul Irby, M.A., is a licensed professional counselor with the Ministry of Counseling and Enrichment. Mental Health Matters is facilitated by the Mental Health Association in Abilene.

The original article can be found here:
http://www.reporternews.com/news/2009/feb/04/effects-abuse-part-3/

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Effects of Childhood Sexual Abuse, Part 2

Effects of abuse, part 2
By Paul Irby Special to the Abilenian
Abilene Reporter-News
Posted January 7, 2009 at 11:28 a.m.

Last month we examined the multifaceted reasons why some children who are sexually abused seem to have more intense and pervasive effects from the abuse and why other children seem more resilient. This month we begin taking a look at what some of those effects can be. Just as the factors leading to these effects are multifaceted, these impacts are multidimensional. Also, keep in mind that the effects mentioned are possibilities, and not all survivors of abuse will experience all of the signs or symptoms detailed in this and subsequent articles. Although we are going to be examining these dimensional impacts in separate articles, they are connected. We know that how we think and what we believe influences the way we feel, and how we feel influences our behavior. Therefore, we begin our discussion with the cognitive or mental impacts sexual abuse can have on its’ victims.

Flashbacks and nightmares are two of the more widely known residual cognitive manifestations. Flashbacks can be triggered environmentally or experienced as unexpected seemingly spontaneous intrusive thoughts. The most common environmental triggers are associated with sight and smell. Seeing the abuser (or even someone resembling the abuser), visiting the location of the abuse, and encountering odors associated with the abuser or location of the abuse are obvious triggers. More subtle triggers are associated with other senses, such as hearing certain phrases, voice tones, inflections and encountering certain textures.

Flashbacks are generally experienced in one of two ways. Either the survivor experiences memories of the abuse like a terribly vivid movie playing in their mind, or they have a memory that causes them to consider all the ways they could have done something differently, further exacerbating the harmful myth that they had a role in perpetuating the abuse.

Nightmares are an issue that deals with the unpredictable and irrational subconscious, and therefore it is difficult to have truly insightful comment. Therefore, my input here is fairly limited. Nightmares can have varying degrees of frequency and intensity. Some experience recurrent nightmares (the same nightmare over and over), while others have different nightmares that reflect or distort what they encountered. Some antidepressant medications, such as Cymbalta, have been associated with more vivid and realistic feeling dreams. Please consult your prescribing physician if you have questions related to medication side-effects.

Beliefs that survivors of abuse develop about themselves and the world around them are other devastating cognitive impacts. Consider for a moment your own experience of sitting in a restaurant and noticing couples or families sitting together and seemingly enjoying a meal. It is most people’s natural tendency to assume the best about those whom we observe. We assume the couple are happy and in love or that the family is healthy and stable.

Between the ages of 10 and 13 children begin to develop more abstract, deductive and inductive reasoning. Along with this development, the abused child comes to the correct understanding that his home life and/or experiences are different from what he has seen on the Disney channel or read about in books. This child who is at school or other social places with peers begins to make the same assumptions as we do. However, these assumptions often lead to the distorted belief that no one else’s home life is like theirs and, therefore, they are different from everyone else.

Being exposed to the trauma of sexual abuse often leads its’ victims to believe that the world or certain aspects of it are untrustworthy and unsafe. This is especially true of the child who is abused by a parent or other family member who is “supposed to be” trusted. It is these core beliefs that the child develops about themselves and the world around them that lead to feelings of depression, anxiety, fear, anger, shame and guilt that will be explored in this article next month.

Paul Irby, M.A., is a licensed professional counselor with the Ministry of Counseling and Enrichment. Mental Health Matters is facilitated by the Mental Health Association in Abilene.

Original article found here:
http://www.reporternews.com/news/2009/jan/07/effects-abuse-part-2/

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Effects of Childhood Sexual Abuse, Part 1

April is designated as abuse prevention month for the state of Texas.  Therefore, the majority of posts for this month will orbit around childhood abuse and the effects of such abuse.  I pray that our world can come to a place where no child is ever abused again!

Effects of abuse, part 1
By Paul Irby Special to the Abilenian
Abilene Reporter-News
Posted December 3, 2008 at 11:21 a.m.

It seems the sexual abuse of children is an epidemic in our society. This evil respects no boundaries of gender, race, ethnicity or socioeconomic status. The Mental Health Association of Abilene recognizes thousands of people in the Big Country have been impacted by this epidemic. Therefore, executive director Kirk Hancock has commissioned the penning of six articles over the course of six months for the purpose of educating the general public regarding the potential developmental impacts of sexual abuse on its victims.

When approaching the discussion of this subject, it is important to note there are no standard or predictable outcomes, and some seem to adjust better post-abuse than others.

For the next five months, Mental Health Matters will have articles highlighting how specific dimensions of a person can be impacted by sexual abuse. These articles will take a “shotgun” approach to describing potential impacts. It should be noted not all survivors of sexual abuse will experience all the effects discussed, and the intensity with which others endure their respective impacts will differ. Therefore, it stands to reason that we first answer the question of what factors influence the intensity of the adverse developmental impacts on a child who has been sexually abused.

The duration and frequency of the abuse is one important component to consider. Some children experience the abuse on a daily, weekly or monthly frequency for a duration of months or years. Others have endured less chronic or isolated instances of abuse. It is this latter group that has the least amount of susceptibility to adverse consequences down the road.

Another consideration is the kind of abuse perpetrated. Survivors with the most intense developmental impacts are those who sustained penetration orally, anally or vaginally. The invasive nature of these acts adds to the already deep sense of violation, both physically and psychologically. Sexual abuse can include less invasive, yet still horrific, forms such as manual stimulation and groping over the clothes.

The response of adults to the child’s disclosure of the abuse is another vital piece to understanding the resilience of some abused children.

Common mistakes parents and other significant adults make when a child musters the courage to disclose the abuse are not believing the child, blaming the child or defining the child by the abuse. The lack of support, blame and even punishment of the child can have just as devastating impacts as the actual abuse.

Other factors include the age and temperament of the child, the presence of violence or intimidation, along with the sexual abuse and the relationship of the abuser to the abused.

While nothing positive exists in an abusive situation, there are “best case” scenarios. Bear in mind, even children who come from a “worst case” scenario who access quality professional help and have a solid social support system can not only survive, but thrive.

Next month we will explore possible mental or cognitive impacts sexual abuse can have on a child.

Paul Irby, M.A., is a licensed professional counselor with the Ministry of Counseling and Enrichment. Mental Health Matters is facilitated by the Mental Health Association in Abilene.

Original article found here:
http://www.reporternews.com/news/2008/dec/03/effects-abuse-part-1it-seems-sexual-abuse-children/

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Porn Turned Thousands of British Children into Sex Offenders, Report Says

by Ben Johnson
Mon Mar 04, 2013 17:27 EST

LONDON, March 4, 2013, (LifeSiteNews.com) – Pornography and depictions of sexuality have turned more than 4,500 British children – some of them as young as five – into sexual offenders, according to a UK-based child welfare charity.

A Freedom of Information Act request showed that 4,562 minors – 98 percent of them boys – committed 5,028 sexual offenses over a three year period, from 2009-2012.

Three separate police forces reported five-year-olds committing sexual offenses.  However, the London Telegraph reports, “the true figure” of total offenders “could be even higher as nine forces, including the three largest – the Metropolitan Police, Greater Manchester Police and West Midlands Police – could not provide the relevant figures.”

Twenty percent of cases reported involved a family member. In another third, a family friend was victimized.

“We know that technology and easy access to sexual material is warping young people’s views of what is ‘normal’ or acceptable behavior,” said Claire Lilley, policy adviser at The National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC).

The report’s content, though specific to Great Britain, contains universal truths.

“Child-on-child sex abuse and rape is a growing problem in every culture where pornography flourishes,” Patrick Trueman, a former federal prosecutor in the Reagan administration and president of Morality In Media, told LifeSiteNews.com.

“Children act out what they see. If they see acts of love and charity, they will mimic those,” Trueman said. “But when they see sexual violence, domination, rape, and other similar acts so commonly depicted in modern-day pornography, as today’s children do, they will act out those, as well.”

The British report joins an accumulating mound of heart wrenching stories showing how pornography has permanently scarred children around the world – both the victims and the perpetrators.

In the Australian state of Victoria alone, 414 minors were referred for sexual offenses to the Centres Against Sexual Assault (CASA) last year. Just more than half could be placed in rehabilitation programs.

Therapists continually cite the role access to pornography and sexually explicit television scenarios play in sexualizing children and, in some cases, triggering them to exploit others.

Child therapist John Woods of London reported a case of a 13-year-old boy who raped his five-year-old sister after developing a “complex fantasy world” warped by “two years of constant porn use.”

Similar reports come from North America.

In Canada, a 13-year-old boy said his gay porn consumption led to his repeated rape of a four-year-old boy who lived in his foster home.

The omnipresent flickers of porn have caused alarm at the highest levels of European government.

A cross-party report from the British parliament found most boys learned about sex by watching pornography, an influence that “negated the primacy of relationships whilst promoting a self-centered focus of sex.”

That influence magnifies anti-social behavior. A 2010 study from Australia’s La Trobe University found boys who watch porn are more likely to harass girls. Nearly one-third of British girls aged 16-18 said they experienced unwanted sexual touching in a 2010 YouGov poll.

“We must do more to shield young people from an increasingly sexualized society,” Lilley said.

As a result of cases such as these, Iceland is considering banning pornography because of the harm it inflicts on women and children.

The move touched off fierce debate in the UK. This report elevates that discussion to a new importance.

“The world is suffering an untreated pandemic of harm from pornography and children are suffering the most,” Trueman told LifeSiteNews.

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Porn Apps Pose Rising Risk to Mobile Users

Remember those awful pop up attacks when web browsing “free” porn sites on your computer?  Get ready to get attacked again if you use porn apps on your smart phone!

http://www.usatoday.com/story/tech/2013/03/02/mobile-attacks-click-jacking-data-theft/1957905/
by Byron Acohido, USA TODAY

SEATTLE – Cybercriminals are stepping up the spread of data-stealing programs via pornographic content optimized for viewing on smartphones and touch tablets.

What’s more, free apps and mobile ads are being pervasively manipulated by scammers bent on redirecting your clicks to web links you had no intention of visiting. Known as click-jackers, these scammers get paid by an advertiser for each such click.

Those two developments — outlined in recent reports from network security firm Blue Coat Systems and anti-virus giant Trend Micro — underscore how cybercriminals have begun adapting tried-and-true scams  from the  PC browser world to mobile devices.

“Mobile threats are following the money,” says Kurt Roemer, chief security strategist at Citrix Systems. “With mobile becoming the centerpiece of digital life, attackers are  flocking to this target-rich environment in new and innovative ways.”

Mobile attacks, for the moment, are largely focused on handsets and tablets that use Google’s open source code Android operating system, and fall mostly into the category of nuisances, says Sasi Murthy, Blue Coat’s director of product marketing.

The cybercriminals spreading corrupted links, via mobile porn content, appear to be after your phone number and list of contacts to sell to spammers, for instance. This ultimately can  lead to your friends receiving more spam on their mobile devices, but nothing more serious than that.

“It’s a mistake to trust that apps you download to your mobile device are inherently trustworthy,” says Jamz Yaneza, Trend Micro’s threat research manager. “Folks are having to learn the hard way that that’s not necessarily true.”

In fact, much of the malicious activity in the mobile space currently revolves around either stealing address book contacts and profile information, or tricking users into clicking to certain weblinks to generate advertising payments to the scammer.

In the end, “someone other than the legitimate developer is compensated for ad impressions,” says Kevin Mahaffey, founder and chief technology officer of Lookout Mobile Security.

In the current mobile environment, consumers ought to exercise healthy skepticism around any offer that seems too good to be true, says Mark Risher, CEO of data integrity  firm Impermium.

“On small screens it can be hard to see the signs of a scam, so when in doubt, try viewing the Web page for that app from a full-sized laptop and look for the tell-tale signs,” Risher advises.

Be suspicious of sloppy writing or descriptions and any security warnings that appear in your full PC Web browser, he says.

No one in tech security or law enforcement expects mobile threats to remain relatively benign for long. “Any mobile device that’s accessing the Web and accessing Web downloads is, in fact, exposed,” Murthy says. “And that presents a very real and immediate danger to mobile users.”

One big security hole cybercriminals are expected to increasingly focus on is the fact that the operating systems of mobile devices are cumbersome to upgrade. A recent survey by security firm Rapid7 revealed that 67% of devices using the revered Apple iOS platform, which powers iPhones and iPads, are running without the latest feature upgrades and security patches.

“Mobile devices are typically required to be updated by employees and patches can’t be pushed by organizations,” says Giri Sreenivas, mobile vice president at Rapid7. “Because of this, there is a high percentage of devices running out-of-date firmware.”

Android devices are difficult to upgrade because neither the carrier nor the handset maker have much of a financial incentive to push out security patches in a timely manner, says Chris Soghoian, principal technologist at the American Civil Liberties Union.