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May 22, 2013 By Castimonia

Pornography Fueling Human Trafficking

Pornography Fueling Human Trafficking
Posted by Ferrell

Attention: Pornography is causing more pain and suffering than many imagine. The Internet is the latest means of encouraging sexual fantasies, but the devastating impact of pornography is anything but a fantasy. There are victims, real victims.

Ken Camp of the Baptist Standard has written a helpful story that connects pornography to human trafficking. Ken covered a recent “Freedom Ring” event at First Baptist Church of Commerce that dealt with trafficking. Freedom Ring is an alliance of Christians against human trafficking, and the Texas Baptist Advocacy/Care Center and Woman’s Missionary Union of Texas are key partners in the effort.

Pornography represents a form of commercial sexual exploitation with “branches and tentacles that reach into our homes,” said Noel Bouché, vice president of PureHope. Pornography constitutes 10 percent of the Internet’s content, and its creators use trafficking victims—many of them minors—in porn production, Noel Bouché, vice president of PureHope, told the Commerce gathering.

There is an evil at work here that is hard to comprehend, and it’s fueled by money, much of it paid by viewers of pornography.

Christians need to realize the magnitude of the commercial sex industry,  said Tomi Grover, founder of TraffickStop, which is supported by the Texas Baptist Cooperative Program and the Mary Hill Davis Offering for Texas Missions.

“Pornography in the United States makes more than the National Football League. It makes more than Major League Baseball. It makes more than the National Basketball Association. In fact, it makes more than all three combined,” Grover said.

“It’s a global problem that’s happening in our own country and that’s being channeled into every home,” Bouché said.

Grover made a staggering comment. ”The average age of exposure to pornography is 8 years old,” she said. “Exposing children to porn is like putting their brains on opiate drugs.”

Bouché urged Christians to pursue a four-fold response–pray, understand, resolve, and engage.

Why respond? Because Scripture teaches that every person is his or her brother’s keeper, and God hears the cry of the oppressed, said Van Christian, pastor of First Baptist Church in Comanche. Churches cannot escape their responsibility to God when it comes to responding to issues of trafficking and sexual exploitation.

The Baptist Standard story provides more detail on the conference.

This needs to be talked about in our churches–from the pulpit and in smaller groups. It’s not easy to talk about, but the need is there. People are hurting and suffering. We need to care enough to do something.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, escorts, gratification, healing, Intimacy, lust, masturbation, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, ptsd, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers, trafficking, trauma

May 19, 2013 By Castimonia

My Time with an Ex-Porn Star

At the suggestion from sex addiction recovery experts, I have removed the name (both real and actress) of the female mentioned in this post as to not trigger recovering sex addicts into “searching” for “more information” about her which could lead to them sexually acting out with pornography.

My Time with an Ex-Porn Star
By Frank Park
Originally posted at The Resurgence

For Mars Hill’s Real Marriage sermon “The Porn Path,” we flew up C****, a former porn star who’s since become a Christian, as a special guest to be interviewed in a Q&A with Pastor Mark and Grace as part of the sermon. After the event, I chauffered C***** and her friend to the airport to catch their flight home to LA. Due to the severe snowstorm that hit Seattle this winter, her friend was able to get on a last-minute flight, but C***** missed her flight altogether. This meant that I ended up spending a few more hours with her. Little did I know that my time with her would be life-changing.

As we waited to be sure her friend’s flight successfully took off, C***** began to share her story, much of which she did not tell at the event. Her words brought all that I had learned about the effects of porn to a completely different level. It suddenly became very real. There was a real face behind the facts, a real voice behind the statistics.

I took away three major things from our conversation that will forever remain with me.

1. Women Are Extra-Special

1 Peter 3:7 tells men, “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”

When I read the words “weaker vessel,” I don’t see it as saying women are the weaker sex or unequal to men, but rather that women are extra-special, especially your wife.

C*****’s story helped me to see that being a man means treating women (and in the future, my wife) with extra special care, love, and respect. I am to treat them as I would the most delicate vessel in my pottery collection—not because it is prone to break, but because it is invaluable.

2. Porn Is Real

I know firsthand how addicting porn can be. During my college years, I was serving the church and watching porn. I was leading worship and watching porn. I was a leader in the church and watching porn. It was a love-hate relationship. No professing Christian, after watching porn says, “I’m glad I did that.” We know it is wrong by conviction from the Holy Spirit and regret it after the fact—but we keep going back.

If you’re looking at porn, know this: real people are involved and real damage is done. When you watch porn, you are supporting and encouraging the sexual, emotional, psychological, and physical abuse of real women, not just actors.

Talking with C*****, my disgust over my history of watching porn and my gratitude to Jesus for redeeming me from that horrid habit simultaneously reached new highs. I wish every guy could sit down with C***** for five minutes and just talk to her. If that doesn’t convict him, I don’t know what will.

3. Jesus Can Redeem Anyone’s Story

What stood out the most to me as C***** shared—despite all that she had been through over the years with guys (not men) treating her as a commodity rather than a person and disrespecting her entirely—was that she told her story with a smile on her face.

C***** knows without a doubt that her past does not define her—Jesus does. She knows that in Christ, she is righteous and spotless without blemish. She has hope for the future because of Jesus. She knows that Jesus is using her past to redeem others in the present. She now works for a non-profit organization called Treasures, which aims to reach out to women in the sex industry with the message that they are loved, valued, and purposed by Christ.

For those of you struggling with porn, know this:

  • There’s no such thing as “free porn” —it’s a lie.
  • Real women are being hurt in the porn industry.
  • Porn promises what only Jesus can fulfill.
  • Because Jesus conquered sin and death, this sin can be put to death once and for all in your life. You are fighting a battle that has already been won through Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection.

Jesus really can and will redeem anyone’s story.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, lust, masturbation, meeting, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, ptsd, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers, trauma

May 9, 2013 By Castimonia

Feelings for Thursday

The post below was copied from a spouse of a sex addict.  In understanding our own addiction, we must also understand the pain and trauma we have caused our wives.

Feelings for Thursday
Posted by Samantha Baker on September 20, 2012

How I feel about myself looking back over 5 years:

Devalued
Emotionally Violated
Traumatized
Emotionally Abused
Unloved
Used
Could never meet expectations
Never good enough
Abandoned
Criticized
Broken Vows
Lied to
Detached
Betrayed
Disrespected
Vulnerable

My emotions now:

Emotional Pain
Hurt
Anger
Rage
Shame
Guilt
Turmoil
Fear
Numb
Empty
Isolated
Lonely
Confused
Obsessed
Lost
Broken Trust
Heartbroken
Depressed
Stuck
Constantly Triggered
No longer special

How do I feel about the future:

Unsure
Scared
Fear
Cautiously Hopeful
Meaningful
Emotional Intimacy
Honesty
Empathy
Understanding
Trust
Forgiveness
Communication

But the big question is, how to I get to the hope of the future and out of the pain of the now?

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, Emotions, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, lust, masturbation, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, ptsd, purity, recovery, resentment, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, strippers, time, trauma

May 7, 2013 By Castimonia

A Little Humor Based on Reality

I saw this comic a while back and couldn’t help but laugh and share it.  I’ve heard so many stories in my recovery meetings where computers were infected and nearly destroyed by men who unwittingly downloaded a virus with the “free” pornography they were trying to download.  Imagine if our computers could literally “see” the stuff we watched or downloaded while acting out in our addiction?  Yes, I believe they would be physically ill as much as our partners were when they found out the stuff in which we were involved.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, castimonia, christian, gratification, healing, human trafficking, masturbation, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses

May 4, 2013 By Castimonia

Overexposed and Under-Prepared: The Effects of Early Exposure to Sexual Content

Overexposed and Under-Prepared: The Effects of Early Exposure to Sexual Content
Originally posted by Scott Williams

From Psychology Today:

“Adult Content .. Penn St officials head to cou...Children as young as 8 and 9 are coming across sexually explicit material on the Internet and in other media. Although research is just beginning to assess the potential damage, there is reason to believe that early exposure to sexual content may have the following undesirable effects:

Early Sex. Research has long established that teens who watch movies or listen to music that glamorizes drinking, drug use or violence tend to engage in those behaviors themselves. A 2012 study shows that movies influence teens’ sexual attitudes and behaviors as well. The study, published in Psychological Science, found that the more teens were exposed to sexual content in movies, the earlier they started having sex and the likelier they were to have casual, unprotected sex.

In another study, boys who were exposed to sexually explicit media were three times more likely to engage in oral sex and intercourse two years after exposure than non-exposed boys. Young girls exposed to sexual content in the media were twice as likely to engage in oral sex and one and a half times more likely to have intercourse. Research also shows that teens who listened to music with degrading sexual references were more likely to have sex than those who had less exposure.

High-Risk Sex. The earlier a child is exposed to sexual content and begins having sex, the likelier they are to engage in high-risk sex. Research shows that children who have sex by age 13 are more likely to have multiple sexual partners, engage in frequent intercourse, have unprotected sex and use drugs or alcohol before sex. In a study by researcher Dr. Jennings Bryant, more than 66 percent of boys and 40 percent of girls reported wanting to try some of the sexual behaviors they saw in the media (and by high school, many had done so), which increases the risk of sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies.

Sex, Love and Relationship Addictions. Not every child who is exposed to sexual content will struggle with a mental health disorder, but research shows that early exposure to pornography is a risk factor for sex addictions and other intimacy disorders. In one study of 932 sex addicts, 90 percent of men and 77 percent of women reported that pornography was a factor in their addiction. With the widespread availability of explicit material on the Internet, these problems are becoming more prevalent and are surfacing at younger ages.

Sexual Violence. According to some studies, early exposure (by age 14) to pornography and other explicit material may increase the risk of a child becoming a victim of sexual violence or acting out sexually against another child. For some people, habitual use of pornography may prompt a desire for more violent or deviant material, including depictions of rape, torture or humiliation. If people seek to act out what they see, they may be more likely to commit sexual assault, rape or child molestation.

Preserving Our Children’s Youth

Early exposure to sexual content in the media may have a profound impact on children’s values, attitudes and behaviors toward sex and relationships.”

Related articles
  • Exposure to Sexual Content in Popular Movies Predicts Sexual Behavior in Adolescence (psychologicalscience.org)
  • Why You Should Monitor Your Child’s Exposure to Movie Sex (psychologytoday.com)

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, lust, masturbation, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, ptsd, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers, trauma

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This site is intended for individuals who struggle with maintaining sexual purity. This information is posted for individuals at various stages in their recovery, year 1 to year 30+; what applies to some, may not apply others. Spouses are encouraged to read this blog with the caveat that they may not agree with, understand, or know the reason for some items posted. As always, take what you like and leave the rest.

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