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The Mainstream Figures Out That Porn is Bad for You

The Mainstream Figures Out That Porn is Bad for You

by scottwoodtherapy

It is encouraging that noting the dangers and the addictive nature of porn use has become increasingly mainstream.

GQ magazine published an article on “10 Reasons Why You Should Quit Watching Porn.”  http://www.gq.com/story/10-reasons-why-you-should-quit-watching-porn

They aren’t the same top 10 reasons I would give you, but, hey, these are still good reasons.  In short, porn greatly reduces your opportunity for healthy satisfying sex and relationships.  If you want to have a great sex life and good relationships, step 1: quit watching porn.

Meanwhile, the Utah house of representatives passed a resolution declaring porn a “public health crisis.”  This is not a bill (not passing a new law), but a public statement about the nature of the problem. “The resolution also cites research that shows pornography lowers self-worth, leads to unhealthy views of sex and relationships, increases the odds of infidelity, and is a major cause of divorce.”  http://fightthenewdrug.org/state-of-utah-makes-history-declares-pornography-a-public-health-crisis/

Let’s take a different angle on it.  The women who are shrieking with apparent ecstacy are not as willing participants as they seem.  Here is an article about the abuse and trauma these women suffer, “Multiple Pornstars Speak Out About The Reality of The Pornography Industry!”  http://castimonia.org/2013/08/15/multiple-pornstars-speak-out-about-the-reality-of-the-pornography-industry/

Actor Terry Crews has also been vocal about the damaging effects of porn use.  http://fightthenewdrug.org/why-actor-terry-crews-wants-people-to-stop-watching-porn/  Crews commented on quitting porn to get his life back.  When I work with sex addicts, I frequently point out that recovery is not about stopping a behavior, but about reclaiming your life.

You may note with these sources, that there is not a lot of moralizing about porn.  One could certainly cite many moral objections.  These sources are about the real damage to lives that happen because of compulsive porn use.

This life of fantasy is just that: fantasy.  It isn’t real.  It keeps you from the joy of the real thing.  If you believe that you can stop, but choose not to (typical of the mind of the addict), try stopping for a month.  You can find some tools on https://www.nofap.com/.  There is also a Sexual Addiction Screening Test available at http://www.recoveryzone.com/.   If you really can’t stop, get some help.  You can locate a certified sexual addiction therapist in your area at http://www.iitap.com/therapists-directory-search/ .  Help is available.  Your life will be better for it.

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Sex Trafficking Survivor: A Woman’s True Story – VIDEO

 Powerful story of a survivor’s experience with sex trafficking.

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Castimonia Purity Podcast Episode 28b: Mike and Sex Addiction – Testimony and Interview (Part B)

God wasn’t through with Mike in the midst of his addiction. He didn’t abandon Mike during his discovery.  God walked with him and carried him through the pain to reach better days on the other side.

Listen as Mike discusses the practical and supernatural ways that he found hope and freedom. Mike discusses the power of recovery groups and not isolating.  He was able to establish years of sobriety based upon the truth that God put on his heart.

For more information about our podcast or to find ways to get help. Please email us at the puritypodcast@castimonia.org

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Going Home – VIDEO

Although this is a “Bollywood” short, it is a great, sobering video for us to watch.  Why don’t we try to make our world a safer place for our children?  It all starts with us.

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Journal Through Recovery Entry 13: Giving a First Step

My counselor just let me know that he thought my First Step was ready. There were parts I wanted to leave out. Disclosing was hard enough. Looking at my wife and telling her all of my sins, my deep rooted sexual sins…that was excruciating. Now, I get to do it again, this time with other men in recovery.

Step One: “We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.”

I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.  For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” (Romans 7:18)

Powerless is the appropriate word. I am powerless. I didn’t know that. I didn’t know I was powerless. I thought the opposite. I thought I was in control. I thought I could “manage” my life and had managed it quite well. I feel powerless as I read over my First Step, my description of how and why I ended up here in recovery, powerless.

Of all the options, I had to pick Castimonia for a recovery group. First steps are detailed, thorough, written and read out loud…at a group meeting. Other recovery groups make them short and private. Not Castimonia. Nice. (Sex Addicts Anonymous also practices giving a complete public First Step).

I let the leaders of Castimonia know that I was ready to do my First Step. I expected to wait a week or two before it could be scheduled. That turned out to be wishful thinking on my part. My date was the next day.

The room was full. It kept filling up. I hadn’t been in a meeting this large. Maybe it was me just thinking that …nope, its full! We opened the meeting, read through all the readings, finished up, and the leader stated that today would be a First Step, unlike any other meetings. One of my accountability partners introduced my First Step. I could breathe a little seeing my friend there, the one I had read it to already. Maybe I wouldn’t hyperventilate before I started.

So now its my turn…“Hi, I am a believer in Christ and a recovering sex addict and this is my First Step…”

I couldn’t look up. The leader told me not to get too deep in my shame, to focus on the guilt for my actions but not allow myself to be identified by them. I tried hard. I kept repeating the Serenity Prayer in my head the entire time.

Reading those words, my life story, my sexual sin, the damage I caused, how I tried to minimize them in the past and how I try not to think about all of them even now. It’s so much. I spoke out loud the unmanageable parts of my life, the insanity, the costs. And then I finished.

The feedback started…guys identifying with different aspects of my story. I told one guy that I had heard his testimony and it gave me courage to speak out loud an early part of my story that caused me the most shame. He told me that I would get to a point where I wasn’t ashamed to tell my story. I would know that God wants me to use it to show others that He can work in all areas, even the darkest.

I wrote this in my journal after I finished:

“God help me let go of my shame. Help me to not be ashamed of my story. Help me to know you can and will use my story for your glory and to impact others. Give me strength and guidance in how to share and use my story to impact my family.”