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Sexual Purity Support & Recovery Group

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spouses

January 4, 2013 By Castimonia

A Letter From Your Favorite Porn Site Before You Got A Girlfriend

For the sake of the members of this site, I have edited out triggering or offensive language.  This fake letter is very scary to those of us who visited porn sites and thought we could hide our secret.  The reality is, on the internet, nothing is secret.  I recall as an administrator of a discussion board, I could find user’s IP addresses and track them down if the need arose.  Never had to do it.  But what if pornographers wanted us hooked on their drug so bad, that they would out us if we didn’t go back?  Thankfully, for a lot of us, we have entered real recovery, having done a full clinical disclosure to our spouses and loved ones. 

WANT TO INCREASE YOUR SIZE BY FORTY INCHES OR MORE? CLICK HERE!! Haha, just kidding. We both know you’d never get close to the stallions we’ve got in our stables. How you doing, kid? Haven’t seen you around in some time. Been a while since “P****Destroyer6969″ graced our front page. How’re things? Still using that “fake_email123456@yahoo.com” address? Haha, just kidding, we know you just made that up.

Yeah, bet you thought you’d slip that by our servers, huh? Man, if I had a nickel for every yahoo/hotmail email address that was some amalgam of “fake”, “p****“, “email”, and “fart”, I’d have exactly $3,455.45. You’d think someone would make an effort and just re-invite themselves to Gmail, and we’d get some classier email addresses. But no.

So yeah, we know about your fake email address. But hey, it’s cool, it’s cool. We’re not judging, it’s just a fake email porn address. No, it’s your real email address that interests us. “sherma43@rutgers.edu” Or should we say Benjamin William Sherman, Jr? From Hackensack, NJ? Yeah, we know all about that. You’d be surprised at how much we know about our customers. For instance, of course, we know that you love “Big T***” and “A***” and “Asian Tentacle R***“. We got that from Google. We also know you’re into “Pre-1970 Liberia”, “Socialism”, and “Liberian Economy”. How’d that paper go, by the way? “Socialism’s Effect on Pre-1970 Liberian Economy”? What did your professor think? What’s his name? Professor Alan Jackson?

You’re probably getting a little uneasy right now. But you’ve got nothing to worry about, we’re harmless. To our customers. To our active customers. To our active, paying customers.

You see, we know a lot about you. More than you think. You’re probably trying to laugh this off now, thinking this is a joke. But I can prove it. Here it comes. Watch this. Andrea. Oh, no big deal, Andrea’s a common college girl’s name. Andrea Thompson. Of Metuchen, NJ. Rutgers Class of ’09. That you’ve been dating since February.

Seems your patronage of our little business has sharply declined since February. See, we’re thinking there’s something of a correlation to be drawn here. You’ve been getting lots of free sex from your little lady love there. You just don’t feel like going through the trouble of logging on and seeing two other people go at it when you can get it yourself. “Why would I want to watch two strangers f*** when I can get my D wet for free?” Haha, we’ve heard that before.

I’ll tell you why you would want to watch two strangers f*** instead of getting your D wet for free. Because if you don’t, Andrea will be getting a lovely new pearl necklace to complement that pretty new bracelet you got her. And you’ll be getting a batch of new videos featuring one of our most recent amateur models, Andi. With an “i” at the end. I think you’ll find her familiar.

So here’s where we get to the point, Ben. We want to see your cyber-face around here a little more often. If you don’t think we’re serious, ask Holli, Brandi, Staci, and Brittni’s boyfriends. They’ll be sure to fill you in.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, lust, masturbation, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers, trafficking, trauma

December 28, 2012 By Castimonia

Video – Serey’s Story – Abolition International

It is important for those of us who are recovering sex addicts that acted out with prostitutes that all of them prostitute by force, not by choice.  This is Serey’s story on how she was sex trafficked in Camboida – bought and sold over and over again, like a piece of meat.  However, thanks to Abolition International, she has been given a second chance.  I am a believer that everyone deserves a second chance.  I would not be leading this ministry had I not been given a second chance…

Serey’s (pronounced ‘sir-ray’) story is based on a true account from the Transitions’ Dream Home in Cambodia. The Dream Home is an established safe home in Cambodia for young girls rescued from sex trafficking. It isn’t just a safe place for girls rescued from trafficking, it’s a home where they can learn to dream again.

You can help give freedom to more girls like Serey. Support the Dream Home expansion and give more girls the chance to dream again.  abolitioninternational.org/cambodia

Share hope – share this film with your friends and family Wear hope – buy the To Be Free bracelet as a reminder of stories you’ve heard Ignite hope  – host an event and share these stories with your community tobefreestories.com/support.html

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts, Videos Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, lust, masturbation, meeting, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, ptsd, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers, trafficking, trauma

December 26, 2012 By Castimonia

Castimonia Saturday Morning Meeting Topic 12/22/12 – Men of the Bible – Solomon

Solomon [Sŏl’omon]—peace or peaceable. The tenth son of David, and second by Bath-sheba, and the third king of Israel who reigned for forty years (2 Sam. 5:14; 12:24). Solomon was also known as Jedidiah meaning, “beloved of the Lord.”

The Man Who Was Full Yet Failed

We know little of the early life of Solomon. The name given him by Nathan, but not repeated because of its sacredness, implies David’s restoration to divine favor (2 Sam. 12:25). Loved of the Lord suggests the bestowal of unusual gifts (2 Sam. 12:24, 25). It is also evident that young Solomon was greatly influenced both by his mother and Nathan (1 Kings 1:11, 12).

With reference to the character and reign of Solomon, we cannot but agree with Alexander Whyte that, “The shipwreck of Solomon is surely the most terrible tragedy in all the world. For if ever there was a shining type of Christ in the Old Testament church, it was Solomon … but everyday sensuality made him in the end a castaway.” Taking him all in all, Solomon stands out as a disappointing figure of Hebrew history. Think of the advantages he began with! There were the almost undisputed possession of David’s throne, immense stores of wealth laid up by his father, exceptional divinely imparted mental abilities, the love and high hopes of the people. Solomon’s start like the cloudless dawn of a summer’s morning, might have been beautiful all his life through, but it ended in gloom because he wandered into God-forbidden paths. Thus a life beginning magnificently ended miserably. The man who penned and preached a thousand wise things failed to practice the wisdom he taught.

The work of Solomon was the development of his father’s ideas of a consolidated kingdom, and what marvelous success crowned his efforts. Exercising the power of an oriental despot, he gave Israel a glory, prestige and splendor unsurpassed in the world’s history. On the whole, however, Solomon seemed to rule for his own aggrandizement and not for the welfare of the people. Doubtless Solomon’s artistic and literary gifts provided the masses with beneficial instruction, but the glory of Solomon brought the common people tears and groans. The great wealth provided by David for the building of a Temple speedily disappeared under Solomon’s lavish spending, and the people had to pay heavily by taxation and poverty for his magnificent whims. Yet Jesus said that the lilies of the field had greater glory than all the gaudy pomp and pride of Solomon.

Solomon’s ambition in the morning of his life was most commendable. His dream was a natural expression of this ambition, and his God-imparted wisdom an evidence of it (1 Kings 3). Then his sacrifice at Gibeon indicates that Solomon desired religion to be associated with all external magnificence. Solomon’s remarkable prayer also breathes the atmosphere of true piety and of his delight in the full recognition of God. Alas, however, Solomon came to the end of his days minus popularity and piety!

This first great naturalist the world ever saw, who wrote one thousand and five songs, three thousand proverbs and who had sagacity beyond compare, took his first step downward when he went to Egypt for his queen. A daughter of Pharaoh, sitting on the throne of David, must have shocked and saddened the godly elect of Israel. With this strange wife came her strange gods.

Then came the harem of outlandish women who caused Solomon to sin (Neh. 13:26). His wives—seven hundred of them and three hundred concubines—whom Solomon clave unto in love, turned him into an idolater (1 Kings 11:1-8). Polygamy on such a vast scale and concession for his wives to worship their own heathen gods was bad enough, but to share in such sacrilegious worship in sight of the Temple Solomon himself had built, was nauseating to God.

Thus sensuality and pride of wealth brought about Solomon’s deterioration. In the Book of Ecclesiastes which the king wrote, he surely depicted his own dissatisfaction with even life itself. All rivers ran into Solomon’s sea: wisdom and knowledge, wine and women, wealth and fame, music and songs; he tried them all, but all was vanity and vexation of spirit simply because God had been left out.

Of Solomon’s actual end little is known. He is described as an “old man” at sixty years of age. Whether Solomon repented and returned to God was a question warmly debated by the Early Fathers. There is no record of his repentance. He never wrote a penitential psalm like his father before him (Ps. 51). We have his remorse, discontent, disgust, self-contempt, “bitterer to drink than blood,” but no sobs for his sin, no plea for pardon. Thus, with such a tragic failure before us, let us take to heart the fact that Solomon’s wisdom did not teach him self-control, and that the only legacy of his violated home life was a son “ample in foolishness and lacking in understanding,” as C. W. Emmet expresses it.

Filed Under: Meeting Topics, Saturday Morning Meeting Topics, Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, Character Defects, christian, Emotions, escorts, father wound, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, Jesus Christ, lust, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, ptsd, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers, trauma

December 16, 2012 By Castimonia

Is Pornography Destructive to a Marriage?

Is Pornography Destructive to a Marriage
by Samantha Baker

This has come up a lot in my world in the past year.  I used to be some what on the fence about it.  I kind of felt, what other people do in their marriage is fine…I kind of don’t appreciate it in mine…but…if I don’t really think about it, it’s not there.

But my thinking has changed a lot.  And now I’m off the fence and my feet are planted firmly on the ground.  My stance, is yes.  I believe that pornography can absolutely be destructive to a marriage/relationship.

Now, I know most men feel differently.  They don’t see much harm in it, if any at all.  Men are more visual.  Men need an outlet. Men sometimes, just need it to relieve stress.  What’s the harm????

But, there can be just so much harm.  Now I get that some women are absolutely fine with it, and some even choose to participate.  And kudos to you.  But that isn’t a majority of women.  I think some women go along with it to please their spouse/SO.  I think some feel they need to agree to it, in effort to keep their spouse/SO from cheating (HA!), and some aren’t given a choice.  Plainly put, I don’t think many women really are “ok” with porn.  Not even the ones performing in it.

For my marriage, it absolutely has been destructive.  To the point, that it’s now become a deal breaker.  Yes, I know, that’s pretty bold.  But, I had to draw my line in the sand, and I have.  Because you see, it became an addiction for my husband.  One that he still won’t even admit.  It came between us.  It made it so that there was less closeness and intimacy.  It became more about a sexual act than making love.  And it has had lasting effects on us.  Things that can’t be fixed over night.

When one starts hiding the fact that they are looking at porn on a daily basis, or lying, or covering it up in effort to hide it, it’s gone too far.  When they start treating you like an object instead of a whole person that is to be treated with love and respect, it’s gone too far. When one starts to prefer porn to their partner, it’s gone too far.  It should have never gotten to those places to begin with.

In my perfectly not so humble opinion, the way to avoid the above?  Is to not have it in your life at all.  And this is something I have required of my husband now.  Because I’ve realized, that for our marriage, there is no middle ground.  There is no, well you can look once in awhile.  It has to be none at all.  Otherwise, it will end my marriage.  Because the damage it has already caused is too deep.  I can not let it cause any more.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, lust, masturbation, meeting, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, ptsd, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers, trauma

December 13, 2012 By Castimonia

At Least One of Us is Going to Hell for What You’ve Done

I read this raw and true poem as if were written by a spouse of a sex addict.  Many times I’ve heard spouses say that they can take the slips but they can’t take the lies.  The last two lines ring true of this statement.  I edited out the profanities and hope this spouse’s angry words don’t offend anyone.  Keep in mind, it is ok to have these thoughts and feelings, what is not ok is to verbally abuse your spouse (addict or not) with your offensive language.  Acting out in anger can be very damaging to a relationship!

At Least One of Us is Going to Hell for What You’ve Done
by properlypeculiar

Oh, go and f***ing

f*** another girl

Make it through another lonely night

You don’t need me

I wish you’d not pretend you did

You’ll keep me hanging on the line until I cut you off with something cute like a stutter

or a clever arrangement of words that won’t ever cut you quite deeply enough

to send you racing back to being breathless with me

Say processed, vomited, vapid lines out loud

Close your eyes at just the right moment

Put your arm around me just where it fits

F*** the world forward and back again before my eyes

but don’t ever lie to me

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, Emotions, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, lies, lust, masturbation, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, ptsd, purity, recovery, resentment, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers, trauma

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Castimonia Restoration Ministry, Inc. is a 501c3 non-profit organization


This site is intended for individuals who struggle with maintaining sexual purity. This information is posted for individuals at various stages in their recovery, year 1 to year 30+; what applies to some, may not apply others. Spouses are encouraged to read this blog with the caveat that they may not agree with, understand, or know the reason for some items posted. As always, take what you like and leave the rest.

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