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February 21, 2013 By Castimonia

How Women Made Porn Fashionable

How women made porn fashionable
By Patrick Wanis
Published September 15, 2012
FoxNews.com

Porn is becoming a new ideal and value for young girls. And women are  responsible.

Women are consuming and endorsing porn such as ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ — a  book recognized as ‘mommy porn.’ Poorly written, it is not a how-to-manual and  it’s not poetic erotica.

Pulp/romance novels transformed into a new genre  embracing porn as literature – explicitly sexual scenes featuring  bondage/discipline, dominance/submission and sadism/masochism.

More than  20 million copies have sold in the US (40 million worldwide), and it is yet  another example of the way porn is becoming more than socially acceptable  amongst women. Moreover, it is becoming an aspirational target for women.

Women and the media have linked consuming porn or behaving like a  porn actress with instant money, fame, power, glamour, prestige, respectability  and social acceptability. In other words, if you become a porn actress or behave  like one, you will triumph with all of these things.

Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian became famous and rich for making a sex tape,  and they spun off empires of TV shows, fashion lines, perfumes and paid  appearances. The message is: one leads to the other. But it is women who made  Kardashian famous. And it is women who have become the fans and consumers of  everything Kardashian and books such as Fifty Shades of Grey.

Using sex  for money and fame, women have found a new way to feel powerful and secure  without a man or even necessarily a family – Octomom has openly become a porn  actress and stripper.

Mothers, too, are now sexualizing their daughters  and dressing them up as sexual candy for the world. Lindsay Jackson dressed her  5-year-old, Madisyn ‘Maddy’ Verst, in a sexy police uniform and a Dolly Parton  outfit complete with padded breasts and padded backside for a TV reality show.   And Jessica Simpson dressed her 4-month-old girl in bikinis.

Porn  could never have become mainstream and socially acceptable without the support  and endorsement by women. In human behavior, we call this ‘the law of frequency’ — the more often two things are linked, the more powerful that association  becomes until they become inseparable. And women and the media have linked  consuming porn or behaving like a porn actress with instant money, fame, power,  glamour, prestige, respectability and social acceptability. In other words, if  you become a porn actress or behave like one, you will triumph with all of these  things.

Accordingly, girls are more fascinated and driven by the desire  to become famous than they are to become an engineer, doctor or scientist: Kim  Kardashian has 14 million followers on Twitter.Thus, women are creating new  values and morality promoting money, power and glamour as more important than  intelligence, achievement, motherhood or contribution. Studies reveal that  female college students are more narcissistic than males. And teenage girls are  now also becoming fans of porn actors such as 26-year-old James Deen.

The paradox is that women are becoming more educated than men as women  surpass men in attendance and graduation rates – for every two men who get a  college degree, three women will do also. But, women are failing to realize the  dangers of falling for porn or promoting porn as the new fashionable profession  and path to fame, riches and glory. This is the antithesis of female empowerment  as MTV, Kim Kardashian and Octomom are teaching young girls to gain power over  men by using sex.

Women have now created false empty idols and have lost their real sense of  self-worth, value and significance, replacing it with fleeting pseudo-power and  artificial values and relationships, leaving them feeling unfulfilled and  unsatisfied.

I appeal to women to beware of being deceived and betrayed  into the world of porn and sexual objectification the same way that women were  tricked into smoking cigarettes in the 1920s.

In April 1929, a PR expert,  Edward Bernays, working for a US tobacco company, hired young models to march in  the New York City parade and alerted the press that they were fighting for  women’s rights by lighting “Torches of Freedom” as they lit up and smoked  cigarettes. The media publicized the event and it helped to break the taboo  against women smoking in public. In the same way, women today are using porn as  a misguided attempt to gain power and freedom, and to become more powerful and  independent. And they are only betraying and fooling themselves.

Pornography is much more than a moral or social issue.

Renowned  physicist, psychiatrist, and psychoanalyst Dr. Jeffrey Satinover says porn is “a  form of heroin, hundred times more powerful than before.” Forensic psychologist,  M. Douglas Reed and renowned pharmacologist Candace Pert reveal that pornography  is like a drug that triggers the brain to release a psychopharmacological flood  of “epinephrine, testosterone, endorphins (endogenous morphine), oxytocin,  dopamine, serotonin, and phenyethylamine,” which can lead to addiction and  various other behavioral disorders.

Gal Dines, professor of  sociology and women’s studies and chair of the American Studies Department at  Wheelock College in Boston, has written about and researched the porn industry  for over two decades. Professor Dines, author of “Pornland: How Porn Has  Hijacked Our Sexuality,” believes porn is a public health issue with documented  negative effects on young people, distorting “the way women and girls think  about their bodies, their sexuality and their relationships.”

Pornography  is equally damaging to adult relationships and social bonds – men are struggling  to develop close, intimate relationships with real women with some men now  preferring porn to sex with an actual human being.

Bottom line: porn does  not promote love or sex but rather cruelty and hatred to women, and so, while  women continue to endorse and make porn fashionable or a new ideal, they are  foolishly robbing themselves and undermining all of the positive strides and  triumphs they have made in their quest for equality.

Patrick Wanis, PhD, human behavior and relationship expert. For more  visit: www.patrickwanis.com. Follow  him on Twitter@behavior_expert.

Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/09/15/how-women-made-porn-fashionable/#ixzz26jUScXRd

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, lust, masturbation, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, strippers, trauma

February 18, 2013 By Castimonia

Porn; The Sexification Of Young Women

Porn; The Sexification Of Young Women

Posted on September 16, 2012 by prevailing word ministries
Porn; The Sexification Of Young Women.

As a man gets older, he will engage in porn featuring younger and younger women. Many will cross the line in child pornography. The numbers are increasing of child porn sites.

Child porn is interconnected with child kidnapping and children human trafficking.

The last statistic that I was aware of was that there are over 100,000 child porn websites, and growing.

We know that in the United States, this is illegal and anyone engaging in any form of child porn is subject to the scrutiny of law enforcement. There are sophisticated ways that males will watch and download child porn which is highly disgusting and destroys a child for life.

But that is another subject.

In this article, you will note a couple of things.

One, women exercise power over men with their flesh and femininity.

And they know it.

Proverbs 6:23-25 says….

“For the commandment is a lamp, and the law a light; reproofs of instruction are the way of life, to keep you from the evil woman, from the flattering tongue of a seductress. Do not lust after her beauty in your heart, nor let her allure you with her eyelids.”

This is talking about women that sexified their looks to attract a weak willed, undisciplined male.

The prostitute and the sexual immoral women wait for the simple or gullible males that have no control over their sex lives. Married men that experience marital problems and search for a body to have sex with will throw aside all discipline just to have an orgasm.

Two, mothers that dress their young 5 year olds are “sexying up” their child and it is not the kind of thing mothers should be doing with their child. Mothers are also engaging in sexual immorality and this is just another form of teaching and training their child to view sex as a means of employment and feminine power over men.

Additionally, we see that mothers are also selling their daughters for a variety of means, which at the top of the list is for money.

Whether it is for the drug habit, to pay bills, it really doesn’t matter. It is the job of the mother to protect her child. Not sell her child.

This is nothing new because many women get their way through college, get promotions, and live lavish lifestyles as a high priced escort, street prostitution, and strip joints all across America. They also do work at truck stops along the interstate highways.

No different than the old testament forms of idolatry where sex was a part of the hedonistic idolatry ritual of their times.

Nothing new that it is happening in the church where the sexual immoral women come to church to seduce undisciplined males, both single and married. The continuing drama of sexual immorality in the church is raging and many pastors are not taking control of their sex lives.

In this article, from the media is a very powerful and compelling story of females entering the dangerous house of porn. There are many young females that are giving themselves over to this sinful industry. In some cases, because the economic conditions of our times is squeezing many females towards giving up their bodies to uncaring, violent men, little do they know about what awaits them.

Drugs, alcohol, STDs including HIV/AIDS, rape, 16 hour shoots with different men with well below minimum wage pay. Having watched my share of sexual slavery, males that perform are vicious. The sex industry lets the females be the star of the show. On the side lines are other males waiting to get at the star. It is no more than gang rape.

Mothers, do you really want your daughter to be a part of this ungodly industry?

After you read this article, it’s the same in the church and in the world in dealing with porn.

Masturbation is the only reason why a male or female watch porn.

Porn is just another place where, in private, a person gets off without being involved in a relationship. This is another form of fantasy sex that the devil has billions of people in bondage.

In a 24 hour period, 2.1 billion, to be exact, will download Internet porn.

Wives?

Can you trust your husband to tell you the truth? If you can’t find out why there is a disconnect. Why he is distant from you. When he doesn’t talk to you but could talk to everyone else. Wives, if he hasn’t touched you in weeks or months. Has a lot of FB female friends. And never gives you the time of day.

Porn is where he is. Masturbation is where he is. An adulterous affair is where he is.

If you are sexually addicted, just go back to my home page to find out how to break free, in Jesus’ name. It’s time for you to get right with God first, and then get right in your relationship with your wife.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, child porn, child pornography, children, christian, Emotions, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, lust, masturbation, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, prostitute, prostitutes, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers, trafficking, trauma

February 15, 2013 By Castimonia

Taboo Topics: Pornography and Masturbation

Taboo Topics: Pornography and Masturbation
Originally Posted: http://brettfish.wordpress.com/2012/08/08/taboo-topics-pornography-and-masturbation-intro/

the next topic that i will be dealing with [and starting with my own story] is that of PORNOGRAPHY and MASTURBATION which are often closely linked together.

the idea of Taboo Topics is to take a topic that is very real [and often raw and painful, perhaps embarrassing or just difficult to speak about] but which no one, for various reasons, is speaking a lot about and to invite people who have had experience in that area to share their stories and perhaps offer some encouragement or advice to others who have experienced or are currently dealing with the same thing.

a lot of people suffer or struggle in silence and because no-one is speaking/writing about these things it can feel like you are along in it and are the only one and that no-one else can even begin to understand or appreciate what you are going through. and while each situation is different i think that often someone who has gone through the same type of situation is a lot more able to speak life, truth and encouragement or else able to simply cry/scream/wail in a language you completely understand.

so these are real stories of real people and for the most part people who have been brave enough to share their names and contact details [or are largely open to you being linked to them via me]

PORNOGRAPHY and MASTURBATION is a tricky one. as the saying goes, 92% of guys admit to masturbating, and the other 8% are lying. both masturbation and pornography have been seen as guy issues, often making women feel extremely alienated or like freaks if they are caught up in it, it almost being okay if a guy struggles with it cos that is expected, but surely no women do. i hope we will have some stories here in time that will show differently. the idea of Taboo Topics is not to definitively answer some of the issues we are facing – different people have had different journeys with different issues and so some peoples stories might be wildly different while some may even contradict in their advice or suggestion given. the idea is largely to share that you are not alone in your struggle – someone else has gone through this and a whole bunch of people have discovered freedom and forgiveness and rediscovered or are rediscovering sexual purity. another element with this particular one is that society and the church may have different viewpoints on this – it is important i think to remember that we live in a sex-saturated society that visually/orally/socially puts huge focus and emphasis on sex as the be all and end all and so what is considered ‘normal’ and ‘necessary’ comes with that starting point in mind. my hope is that whatever advice/suggestion/viewpoint people share you will test against scripture and trust that the Holy Spirit will guide you to all Truth and wholeness.

but the biggest thing to know is there is nothing that you have done that will make God love you any less [just as there is nothing you can do that can make Him love you any more] – there is freedom in Jesus and hopefully these stories will help some of you on your journey to get there:

to read about my story [brett “Fish” anderson] click here

to read the story of Catherine Rogers, click here

to read the story of Jaco Hall, click here

to read the story of Steve Heineman click here

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, castimonia, christian, gratification, masturbation, porn, pornography, pornstar, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity

February 9, 2013 By Castimonia

Porn Addiction & Teenagers

Porn Addiction & Teenagers

Posted on September 14, 2012 by Pastor Mike

ABC recently ran a great but scary piece on porn addiction among teenagers.  According to a psychologist who was interviewed, we’re just at the beginning of a pornography epidemic – it will get worse in the next few years.  You can view the ABC’s Nightline report here: “Generation XXX: Teens Addicted to Porn?“

As technology advances, access to porn will become easier and easier while avoiding porn will become increasingly difficult.  Technology isn’t the enemy, per se, but its the conduit through which the porn is so easily delivered to stoke our sinful desires.  If your son/daughter doesn’t have any restrictions on their use of technology (TV viewing, Internet usage, Internet filters, Cell Phone & Smartphones, etc.), I want to encourage you to check out a post I wrote last year: Setting Media Guidelines for your Teenager.

Walt Mueller at the Center for Parent/Youth Understanding has done significant work and has created the “Digital Kids Initiate.”  This is an effort to help parents and youth workers understand the digital world teens live so that we could discerningly affirm what we can while correcting what is dangerous.  As part of the Digital Kids Initiative, Walt has provided two noteworthy resources:

  1. Info Sheet on Children & Pornography
  2. Parents’ Primer on Internet Pornography.

Here are some nuggets taken from the above resources:

  • 93% of boys and 62% of girls are exposed to Internet pornography before the age of 18.
  • The average age of first exposure to Internet pornography is 11.
  • 30,000 Internet users were accessing pornography every second.sdf
  • There were 4.2 million pornographic websites. That equals 12% of all Internet sites.
  • 70% of boys have spent more than 30 consecutive minutes looking at online pornography on at least one occasion. 35% of boys have done this on more than ten occasions.
  • 23% of girls have spent more than 30 consecutive minutes looking at online pornography on at least one occasion. 14% have done this on more than one occasion.
  • The 12-17 year-old age group is the largest consumer of Internet pornography.
  • Only 3% of boys and 17% of girls have never seen Internet pornography.
  • One poll indicates that 50% of evangelical Christian men and 20% of evangelical Christian women are addicted to pornography.

If you haven’t talked to your teenager about pornography, chances are… you’re already behind!  Talk to your kids about porn – yes, it’s uncomfortable and awkward for everyone, but you’re not doing anyone any favors by only talking about things that are easy to discuss!  Take the initiative, and don’t just have “the talk” once and then never again, make it a conversation instead.

What should you do if your son/daughter has been looking at porn?  Here are Walt’s suggestions (as found on the info sheet linked to above):

  1. Control your anger.
  2. Go after their heart, not their behavior.
  3. Keep a discussion going about biblical sexuality.
  4. Examine your own heart. Are you living God’s design for your own sexuality?
  5. Block the doors. Take steps to restrict access and choices, while engaging them in ongoing accountability.
  6. Don’t let up or give up. Shepherd them forward in their spiritual lives with the goal of heart change.
  7. Evaluate whether or not outside counseling is necessary or beneficial.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, castimonia, christian, gratification, healing, masturbation, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity

February 6, 2013 By Castimonia

Practical Ways to Fight Lust

Practical Ways to Fight Lust
September 13, 2012
Originally posted to: http://mtvpastor.com/2012/09/13/practical-ways-to-fight-lust/

Last night at The Conversation (Mt Vernon’s Wednesday night Bible study) we talked about practical ways to fight lust (Matthew 5:27-30). In a world overflowing with lust, how can we as Christians protect ourselves? Here are the highlights from last night. If you struggle with lust, I pray that these truths will help you towards freedom.

1. First, admit that lust is a cancer to cut out, not a sickness to cope with. Lust isn’t a low grade fever. It isn’t something to medicate and cope with. Lust is a stage 2 cancer. If left unchecked, lust can literally destroy your life. The first step to defeating lust is to get serious about it. See it for what it really is: a cancerous sin that threatens your whole way of life.

2. Know where you struggle and go to the extreme to cut the cancer out. You don’t put a band-aid on cancer. You cut it out. You remove it, whatever it takes. People will undergo chemotherapy, radiation, and invasive surgery to remove cancer from their bodies. Shouldn’t we be the same way about sin?

Satan doesn’t have to be creative in the way he gets you to sin. All he has to do is find one thing that works, and keep pounding away at it until he’s destroyed you. You know where you struggle. If you struggle with lusting after nudity in movies, you should never have pay channels. If you struggle with internet porn, get rid of the internet. Wherever the cancer is, go to the extreme to cut it out.

3. Put guardrails in your life to protect yourself. Guardrails exist on the sides of dangerous roads to protect you. The idea is, if you make a mistake and crash, better to endure minor damage against a guardrail rather than fall off the cliff and pay the ultimate price. Put guardrails in your life in your fight with lust. Here are a few guardrails I use personally:

  • No pay channels on Directv.
  • Parental controls on Directv to avoid sexual content.
  • Use internet filter on everything that accesses the internet. I use this not only to protect myself, but my boys (even at this young age) from questionable images. I’ve used x3watch for years and love it. They have filters for computers, iphones and ipads. Check them out!
  • Guardrails even extend to how I interact with women. I’ll never ride alone in a car with another woman, even if it’s down the street. I don’t want anyone driving by to see me riding with another woman and make a bad insinuation.

4. Put guardrails in your family’s life to protect them from the evil one. If you have kids (or a husband) in the house, then you need filters on everything. NEVER underestimate what kids can discover on their own. It’s better to be the mean parent now then to discover twenty years later that they’re addicted to porn.

5. Choose mild embarrassment now over major embarrassment later. If you’ve got a problem with lust, get help now. Yes, it’s embarrassing to admit that you struggle with lust/porn, but it’s better to get help now while it’s still treatable. If left unchecked, lust will grow until it consumes you. At that point, the truth will come out, but it will be too late for you. Get help now if you need it.

We live in a world filled with lust, but that doesn’t mean that we have to be consumed by it. Through the power of the Christ and the wisdom he’s given us, we can conquer lust rather than be conquered by it.

image courtesy of http://www.freedigitalphotos.net

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, affair, Affairs, anonymous sex partners, call girls, castimonia, christian, escorts, gratification, healing, human trafficking, Intimacy, lust, masturbation, meeting, porn, porn star, pornography, pornstar, pornstars, prostitute, prostitutes, ptsd, purity, recovery, Sex, sex addict, sex addiction, sex partners, sexual, sexual addiction, sexual impurity, sexual purity, spouses, STD, strippers

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This site is intended for individuals who struggle with maintaining sexual purity. This information is posted for individuals at various stages in their recovery, year 1 to year 30+; what applies to some, may not apply others. Spouses are encouraged to read this blog with the caveat that they may not agree with, understand, or know the reason for some items posted. As always, take what you like and leave the rest.

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