July 11, 2020
You meant well. You sincerely thought you were saying the right thing. But somehow, your words did more damage than good.
If you know an addict or are even married to an addict, measure your words carefully. Adopt the mantra of a therapist – “Do no harm.”
Let me help. Here are seven things you should never say to an addict.
- “If you loved me, you’d stop.”
- “Your problem is a sign of weakness.”
- “You have to hit rock bottom.”
- “Your whole life is a lie.”
- “You will never change.”
- “If you loved God, you’d stop.”
- “You just need to try harder.”
Never pamper a sex addict. He is responsible for his recovery – period. But don’t create an even bigger problem by telling him or her the wrong thing.
Perhaps you can adopt the approach God took toward a wayward generation 2,700 years ago. “I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, ‘Do not fear; I will help you’” (Isaiah 41:13).
Recovery Step: Sex addicts need accountability and tough love. But they also need something else. In fact, we all do. It’s called grace.