Recovery Articles
Courage to Suffer – The Path to Meaning
https://applyingmybeliefs.wordpress.com/2015/05/02/courage-to-suffer-the-path-to-meaning/
by applyingmybeliefs
In his insightful book “Man’s Search for Meaning” concentration camp survivor Victor Frankl said this:
- But there was no need to be ashamed of tears, for tears bore witness that a man had the greatest of courage, the courage to suffer.
Recovery veterans will probably understand and recognize that suffering and courage are bedfellows in effective recovery programs. Without the courage to enter into new emotional pain and the suffering that comes from that, progress in dealing with compulsions and addictions does not happen.
12-Steppers will know this, in many of the Steps a person has to do something only they can do; step out in courage and suffer as they confess, ask for help, develop their inventory and make amends. This is why the encouragement, the putting of courage into others, of the group and the sponsor are so vital. Without the courage to go forward into new pain and suffering the individual will remain in their struggle and not see healing. Scripture says this:
1 Thess 5:11(a) – Encourage one another and build one another up.
One aspect of courageous suffering that rarely gets spoken about is the spiritual aspect, and yet it may be the most important factor in understanding the need for suffering. This is what God says:
Rom 5:3-5 – Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
Suffering produces endurance, which then produces character, which then produces hope and in this changing of our inner person shame is removed from us through the power of the Holy Spirit. This is one way of defining healing; the removal of shame. And the removal of shame is meaningful because it changes us. We are changed from people who believe we are unworthy to people who believe God loves us, that we are valuable to Him.
So then do you believe Frankl was right? Is there no greater courage than the courage to suffer willingly?
Talk about your choice or choices to suffer, to endure new pain. Was it worth it? Did your journey give you a sense of meaning in your life that was missing before? Are you able to experientially encourage others to choose the path of suffering in order to gain meaning from their troubles and receive some measure of healing?
Castimonia: Battle Plan – Weapons & Armor in the Fight for Sexual Purity
https://www.createspace.com/6471391
I am humbled to announce the publishing of our ministry’s second book:
CASTIMONIA
Battle Plan
Weapons & Armor in the Fight for Sexual Purity
Authored by Servants of Christ
Edition: First Edition
Castimonia is Latin for “moral purity” something every man should strive for.
Castimonia is a Christ-centered 12-Step Support and Recovery program for sexual impurity or sexual addiction with the goal to achieve a Biblically-based sexual purity. We share our experience, strength, and hope with each other so that we may achieve sexual purity and help others overcome sexual impurity or compulsive sexual behaviors.
This book is used for helping men in the Castimonia program fight for their sexual purity with various weapons (proactive tools) and armor (reactive tools). The copyright to this book belongs to Armaturam, LLC and all material in this book is being used by permission of the copyright holder.
Many thanks to Alcoholics Anonymous and Sex Addicts Anonymous for paving the way in the 12-Step world as well as the countless men in recovery and the therapists that have helped facilitate God’s healing of their wounds. Most importantly, thank you to the patient spouses who have put up with our issues long enough to make this ministry and book possible.
Original Publication Date: March 30, 2017
5″ x 8″ (12.7 x 20.32 cm)
Black & White on Cream paper
136 pages
ISBN-13: 978-1536886634
ISBN-10: 1536886637
Related Categories: Self-Help / Twelve-Step Programs
The book can be purchased at any Castimonia meeting or via the Create Space store.
If you are a man struggling with Sexual Purity and would like to purchase a copy of the book for the same amount as sold at Castimonia meetings ($12) please contact the publisher, Armaturam, LLC for a discount rate: Jorge@Armaturam.org
Two Paths
It can be said that the Bible is the book of recovery, recovery of the human race. In today’s topic we’re going to look at one way Jesus discussed salvation, the goal of God’s plan of recovery for each human, and what we call recovery in our modern language. Jesus spoke these words:
Matt 7:13-14 – Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.
Most observers use this scripture to discuss or emphasize that the choice a person makes in becoming a saved person is a narrow choice, which it is. Contextually though, this scripture is in the middle of a section of the Sermon on the Mount that discusses how to live. Therefore the better application is when we think of His words with the perspective that life is travelled on a path. Here the salvation application is that of sanctification, the ongoing salvation work of God in our lives.
One way of looking at this picture of the paths is that we can work through our everyday existence God’s way, which leads to eternal life, or do it our way which leads to destruction, or eternal death. It is the same story with recovery. We can work the proven program or we can go our own way, dealing with the problems under our own power, and go back to acting out.
In every 12 Step program that we know, the same basic promise is found in different words. For example in the blue book of Narcotics Anonymous it says:
- We do not have to understand this program for it to work. All we have to do is follow directions. (p91, sixth edition)
This is the same promise found in scripture. Success, salvation, recovery, whatever way we choose to describe it is found in following directions.
Here are some comparisons that can be made between God’s way and recovery:
- A life focused on personal pleasure leads to destruction, acting out leads there too.
- Following God’s recovery program leads to eternal life, a recovery program leads to a healthy life.
- Communicating with God is part of His program, seeking God is part of every successful recovery program.
- God says we are powerless to save ourselves, recovery programs say that too.
- God says we have to admit our faults, so do all successful recovery programs.
- God says to make amends, so do we.
- The Bible says to be still and know God, recovery programs say to meditate and seek conscious contact with God.
These are just a few examples of a comparison of ultimate recovery and earthbound recovery. Share with us what you think on this subject.
Journal Through Recovery Entry 32: Shame Is Selfish
I love meetings. I hear stuff that I just don’t believe at first. Ok, I know this is a goofy path for a journal entry but hang with me. I believe and the Bible is clear that God reveals Himself to us in many ways including reading His word, prayer, being still and shutting up and listening, worship, and even yes even other people. That includes recovery meetings. See, God LOVES revealing himself to me in recovery meetings. Only, I am too thick to see Him coming most of the time.
So I am going to shamelessly steal this incredible share that a friend of mine used recently in the Thursday night group. Yes, you know who you are. He announced very proudly that tonight his topic would be on shame. I seriously felt the air leave the room. If it was a larger group, you would have audibly heard the collective “ughhhhhh.” Sorry my friend, maybe it was just me but I think we all felt it.
I seriously considered just mentally checking out. I steadied myself for another reminder that shame meant I thought “I am bad” and guilt meant I healthily thought “I did bad things.” So moral of the story, feel guilt not shame. Blah blah blah, right? Only my friend is way smarter than me so of course that isn’t what he said at all.
His opening statement was that shame is an emotion from God but can be completely self centered and hinder recovery. What did he just say? Ok, I am awake now. He said that allowing ourselves to wallow (his words, not mine!) in our shame was another form of justification for our actions. Ok, so that is a bit harsh, don’t you think? I mean, come on. I thought we are supposed to feel sorry for guys stuck in shame because they are wrongly focused on thinking they are a bad person, not in the right area of guilt where they remember God’s salvation and redemption and that they have done bad things. Only…that isn’t what he was saying. He was saying that staying in shame is a cop-out, basically.
Ok, I am really paying attention now. Keep going. So my friend said there are three ways of recognizing that we are stuck in shame in our own lives. Three warning signs that we are in shame and that staying there is selfish.
- We are acting out of fear because we are afraid to expose our true self and need to hide. Yikes, that hurt. Definitely a cop out I take
- We are blaming and refusing to admit the truth. Basically, I let myself off the hook by setting such a low standard. Obviously, I suck so therefore I can’t expect to be much better. Yep, definitely a technique I have used.
- We disconnect and don’t feel or experience our emotions. This robs us from feeling compassion for those we have hurt. Yeah, emotional avoidance. I rock at that.
So shame is selfish. Yeah, I guess it is. So what do I do about it? Community. Community is the key. Being able to walk into my groups, share my garbage, and still be loved. Wow, what an antidote for shame. I love the quote he closed the share with and dropped the mic, so I will steal it (again, sorry my friend!): “As long as I am conditionally known, I will be conditionally loved.”
