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poetry

December 4, 2012 By Castimonia

Against The Odds

I read this poem on addiction and recovery and found it a very interesting reflection on addiction and recovery.

AGAINST THE ODDS
by Pete Ak

I crawled through the desolate universe of addiction
Dug myself low to the depths of despond
Squirmed and slithered as the chemical shroud of anguish
Clothed me in its cold and messy heartless clasp
I wallowed and floundered in my uselessness
Debased myself and surrendered to the cruel stabs of paranoia and dependency.

Craving devoured and deprived me, its victim, of humanity’s greatest gift
For my reason scuttled away like a frightened rabbit.
Then toxic, filthy night black resentment
Crept effortlessly through my veins;
It’s malignant curses poisoned my spirit
And found a home for loathsome introspection.

I dwelt there; trapped
I stooped there, fooled by life itself.
Helpless, beaten as if slain by a ruthless assassin,
Inflicting upon myself the transcendent humiliation of self pity.

Our visit here, a mere finger-click in time
Reasons for staying, prosaic and sublime,
Co-mingle to a multi-coloured alloy
Of confusion and hurt; exhilaration and joy.
A pregnant mosaic that can create and destroy,
Red-hot and blinding; eschewing adventure
Laying us to waste unless we quench
The thirst of the spirit; drink from humanity’s magic.
Consume the capacity to dream wonders
And the urge to realize them.
Swallow the determination to overwhelm
Against the odds.
Recognise the miracle of change,
The strength to endure,
The joy of cherishing,
And the ability to grow
Bigger than the hole you’re in.

Flowers of discovery reveal;
Tearful testimonies heal.
Dwell in natural enchantment,
And eventually – die of having lived.

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This site is intended for individuals who struggle with maintaining sexual purity. This information is posted for individuals at various stages in their recovery, year 1 to year 30+; what applies to some, may not apply others. Spouses are encouraged to read this blog with the caveat that they may not agree with, understand, or know the reason for some items posted. As always, take what you like and leave the rest.

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