CASTIMONIA

Sexual Purity Support & Recovery Group

child sex abuse

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What I Don’t Know

This post was shared as a topic for our Barrayo Men’s Group.  Barrayo is a support group for men who were sexually abused as children.  It meets on Tuesday nights at 7pm.  This is a very powerful group dealing with a very powerful issue.  Healing from childhood sexual abuse is paramount to our overall healing, including that of sexual impurity/addiction.  Please contact Barrayo@Merimnao.org for more information on this group.

By Cecil Murphey 

I don’t know the answers to every problem—even though I may sound as if I do. I don’t understand why some of us gain victory almost immediately and for others it takes years. I don’t know why some male survivors fall back in their old patterns and some never do.

I wish I could give perfect answers to every dilemma and shine a bright light on every dark path. I don’t always have enough light for my own path. Even when I know the answer for myself, I sometimes fail to live up to my convictions.

I do know this, however. It’s shameful to admit when we’ve failed, especially after we’ve determined not to repeat our wrong behavior. And that can refer to anything that impedes our progress.
Almost as bad is to fail and deny it. We’re ashamed and try to hide the fact. Or we make excuses for ourselves by blaming circumstances or saying, “Yes, but if he hadn’t . . . ” Such negative responses mean we by-pass a chance for healing.

Admitting each tiny step in the wrong direction can be one positive, small-but-powerful step toward full recovery. 

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Roger’s Story (Video)

Roger’s journey of recovery has allowed him to face the pain of his childhood sexual abuse and to see how much of his acting out was an attempt to prove that he had what it took to be a man.

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Finding Help

For those men who have been sexually abused as a child, I encourage you to attend our Barrayo meeting on Tuesday nights in Sugar Land.  Please contact Barrayo@merimnao.org for more details.

abused-boy

Survivors of childhood sexual abuse may experience a range of emotions and effects that impact many aspects of their adult lives:

Anger ,Shame, Guilt, Depression, Anxiety, Denial and minimizing, Difficulty in trusting others, Sexual difficulties, Difficulties with relationships, Flashbacks, Memory disorders, Self-blame and self-doubt, Physical health problems, Eating disorders, [and] Substance abuse. Any or all of these aftereffects can combine to produce feelings of depression, isolation and hopelessness. All of these feelings and reactions are normal responses to traumatic experiences. Acknowledging the pain can be the first step in working through the abuse. You deserve support in healing from childhood sexual abuse. You have the right to be believed and listened to, and to express your feelings about the abuse.

Remember:

• You are not alone, and you can get help finding support for all of the ways that childhood abuse impacts your life.

• Local rape crisis centers have information on how to begin healing from your trauma. You can talk to someone over the phone or the center may offer individual counseling and support groups to assist you on the path to recovery. They can offer you referrals for social services or for legal help, too.

• There are many ways to heal from childhood abuse. A counselor can help you create a healing plan that meets your individual needs.

• Help is also available for the important people in your life. Your spouse or partner, friends, family members, children or others may want to seek information so that they can understand your needs and challenges.

• There are people who will listen to you, who understand, and who will help you on your recovery path. You are not alone.
http://www.miamidade.gov/police/victim-adult-victims.asp

“The most important thing in defining child sexual abuse is the experience of the child. It takes very little for a child’s world to be devastated.” – Laura Hough