CASTIMONIA

Sexual Purity Support & Recovery Group

anonymous sex partners

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Anatomy of an Emotional Affair

Is your spouse “catching up” with an old high school friend on Social Media or chat, and you feel uncomfortable… but you can’t put a finger on WHY?  That’s because right now their texts may be just two old friends talking about the past, but if it continues here’s what they’ll start talking about:

Their lives since they parted
Their relationships since they parted
Their families
Their spouses
You (the spouse)
How you’re an excellent parent
How you’re a great spouse
How you’re a wonderful person
Your job
How your job keeps you busy
How your job keeps you away
How they sometimes feel a little lonely when you’re away
How they sometimes feel a little overburdened at home
How they sometimes feel a little taken for granted
How they feel that you don’t ALWAYS listen
How they feel that you don’t ALWAYS understand her
How they feel that sometimes you’re just “not there” for them
How, okay… you’re not ALWAYS such a wonderful person
How they loved hearing from their old friend again
How they look forward to their old friend’s texts/calls/e-mails now
How they feel young again
How they feel appreciated again
How they feel attractive again
How it’s so nice to have someone who just LISTENS again
How it’s been so, so long since someone made then feel that way
How their eyes have now been opened
How they now realize what they truly want and need
How they now realizes that their spouse could NEVER give them that
How insensitive their spouse can be some times
How their spouse can be a real jerk sometimes
How they wonder what it would be like if the two of you would have stayed together “back in the day”
How they now realize that they never really loved their spouse
How they now realize that they really loved their old friend all along
How they ever could have fallen for a jerk like their spouse
How their spouse is the biggest a++hole they’ve ever known
How their spouse is standing in the way of true happiness
How their spouse ruined their life
How they made a big mistake marrying their spouse
How they made an even bigger mistake letting the old friend go
How now they see that they were really meant to be with the old friend
How they desperately have to get away from their spouse
How they’re definitely going to leave their spouse
How they’re talking to divorce lawyers
How they’re going to live happily ever after…

(original author, unknown)

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Deepest, Darkest Secret – VIDEO

By now you probably know I LOVE movies!  I grew up watching tons of movies and still do so today.  A short while ago I watched the movie Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2.  As I watched the movie various scenes stood out to me.  As I have stated before, now that I’m in recovery the Holy Spirit has allowed me to see movies differently and notice subtle (and sometimes blatant) recovery tones within the movie. 

The plot of this movie has been pasted below courtesy of Wikipedia:

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 is a 2017 American superhero film based on the Marvel Comics superhero team Guardians of the Galaxy, produced by Marvel Studios and distributed by Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures. It is the sequel to 2014’s Guardians of the Galaxy and the fifteenth film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. In Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, the Guardians travel throughout the cosmos as they help Peter Quill learn more about his mysterious parentage.

What I saw in this movie was a humorous example of what NOT to do when a man tells you his deepest, darkest secret which is usually done as part of a Step 4 inventory exercise. Many men in recovery struggle with the idea of confessing their deepest, darkest secrets for fear that they will be humiliated or rejected by others.  This movie, although not therapy-accurate, brings humor to a very stressful and intense time in a man’s life.  Hopefully, men who have done this can see the humor in this movie as much as I do and men who fear the Fourth Step and revealing their deepest, darkest secrets can  find the courage to do so after watching this movie.

FAIR USE NOTICE: This video may contain copyrighted material. Such material is made available for purposes such as criticism, comment, teaching, & education, etc. This constitutes a ’fair use’ of any such copyrighted material as provided for in Title 17 U.S.C. section 107 of the US Copyright Law NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT INTENDED! All trademarks and copyrights remain the property of their owners.

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Saturday Morning Meeting Status – 08-26-2017 – Hurricane Harvey

Gentlemen, we are sending out this post to notify you that as of Friday morning we are planning on having the Saturday morning Castimonia meeting at 10am.  If for some reason this meeting is cancelled, a cancellation notice will be posted to this site.  

Please do not drive through high water or a dangerous situation to get to this meeting if you do not feel safe.

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Forgiveness is the Key

by Humble servant

He who covers a transgression seeks love, But he who repeats a matter separates friends.

Proverbs 17:9 NKJV

We must be willing to forgive.  We must  remember that we have been forgiven by the Lord.  He has forgiven us by His love, grace, and mercy.  We didn’t deserve forgiveness but because of His love and His grace He chose to forgive us and to lay down His life for us.  How much more should we be willing to forgive.  If we desire to walk as one we must be willing to forgive one another.

One of the great weapons of the enemy to try to separate and divide God’s people is offense and causing us to become bitter and unwilling to forgive.  Throughout our lives we will be hurt by others.  We live in a world filled with broken people and more than that the body of Christ is filled with broken people who are in transition so naturally we will get hurt or offended at different times in our lives.

But the key is not to allow our bitterness or our pain to control us and dominate us.  Not to allow the pain we feel to bind us and cause us to pull back from others in the body of Christ.  Let us simply be willing to forgive.  Let us cover over the transgressions that may have been done to us.  Let us see people for who they are and understand that we all make mistakes.  Some the mistakes are bigger than others but the truth is that all of us are in process and if we can remember this and be willing to forgive then we will walk in unity and the power of the Holy Spirit.

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Be More Sponge and Less Rock

You will never go where God is not. Envision the next few hours of your life. Where will you find yourself? In a school? God indwells the classroom. On the highways? His presence lingers among the traffic. In the hospital operating room, the executive boardroom, the in-laws’ living room, the funeral home? God will be there. “He is not far from each one of us” (Acts 17:27).

Each of us. God does not play favorites. From the masses on the city avenues to the isolated villagers in valleys and jungles, all people can enjoy God’s presence. But many don’t. They plod through life as if there were no God to love them. As if their only strength was their own. As if the only solution comes from within, not above. They live Godless lives.

But there are Josephs among us: people who sense, see, and hear the presence of God. People who pursue God as Moses did. When suddenly tasked with the care of two million ex-slaves, the liberator began to wonder, How am I going to provide for these people? How will we defend ourselves against enemies? How can we survive? Moses needed supplies, managers, equipment, and experience. But when Moses prayed for help, he declared, “If Your Presence does not go with us, do not bring us up from here” (Ex. 33:15).

Moses preferred to go nowhere with God than anywhere without him.

Do likewise. Make God’s presence your passion. How? Be more sponge and less rock. Place a rock in the ocean, and what happens? Its surface gets wet. The exterior may change color, but the interior remains untouched. Yet place a sponge in the ocean, and notice the change. It absorbs the water. The ocean penetrates every pore and alters the essence of the sponge.

God surrounds us in the same way the Pacific surrounds an ocean floor pebble. He is everywhere – above, below, on all sides. We choose our response – rock or sponge? Resist or receive? Everything within you says harden the heart. Run from God; resist God; blame God. But be careful. Hard hearts never heal. Spongy ones do. Open every pore of your soul to God’s presence.

Today’s devotional is drawn from Max Lucado’s Second Chances.