CASTIMONIA

Sexual Purity Support & Recovery Group

ptsd

By

Somebody Hurt Me – VIDEO

Great sermon from this past Sunday on forgiving those that have hurt us.  Coming from a man that was sexually abused as a child, I have come to understand quite a bit about forgiving those that hurt me.  Nevertheless, this can be applied to various aspects of life to anyone who has been hurt by someone else. If you have been hurt by someone (a loved one, a friend, a co-worker) I urge you to watch this sermon.

1. Forgiveness is the key to healing my hurts.

2. Forgiveness does not mean their actions were “OK” or that I forget what she did. 

3. Forgiveness is a process, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.

4. Hating the person that hurt me keeps my hurt alive!

– Hate is a parasite that hurts us, not the person we hate.

5. Forgiving the person allows my life to move forward!

6. Not forgiving others keeps us locked away in a prison, where we hold the key.

7. Forgiveness is for me, not for the person who hurt me.

 

 

Click on this link to view more messages in the Transformed Series:

http://www.thefellowship.org/series/transformed/

By

Porn Addiction Study Finds Astounding Results

http://pornproofkids.com/2013/11/14/keep-it-real-thursday-porn-addiction-study-finds-astounding-results/

by: pornproofkids.com

brain-scans1“An alarming number of boys, and now girls, could be a click away from addiction. A new study finds porn can affect your brain as much as drugs and alcohol and a new generation of kids has easier access to it than ever.”

Recently ABC Nightline aired a segment called The Teenage Brain on Porn highlighting the brain-changing (and brain-damaging) effects of consuming pornography. (ABC got some things right, but look for my scathing ninja rebuttal at the end of this post.)

VoonThe study was done by Valerie Voon, a lead researcher at Cambridge University. Twenty young men between the ages of 19 and 34, whose lives were controlled by porn, agreed to have their brains scanned while they viewed explicit pornographic images. A control group of men who did not use porn compulsively were shown the same images. The scans were done to see how their reward centers reacted. When the data was analyzed, the results were “astounding.” The reward centers of the compulsive users were twice as active as those in the control group; similar to the responses of drug and alcohol users.

Porn Preferred Over Real Sex

The Nightline piece interviewed several young people who couldn’t seem to stop their porn addiction. One young man in England admitted that he preferred masturbating to porn over real sex with a woman.

Norman Doidge, M.D., author of The Brain that Changes Itself, found the same thing happening in his clients. As their porn addiction altered their brains, they became less interested in real sex with real partners, even when they were readily available.

“The content of what they found exciting changed as the Web sites introduced themes and scripts that altered their brains without their awareness. Because plasticity is competitive, the brain maps for new, exciting images increased as the expense of what had previously attracted them—the reason, I believe, they began to find their girlfriends less of a turn-on.” (Doidge, The Brain the Changes Itself, p 109.)

My Scathing Ninja Rebuttal

This leads us to “the answer” that Nightline came up with for addictions to hard core porn and the damage it does to the impressionable teenage concept of sex. Are you ready for it?

More porn!

Oh, but this is a kinder and gentler porn, showing people actually making love.

Seriously?

Let me de-bunk this right now. When people begin down the slippery slope of porn, especially kids with very vulnerable brains that are still wiring at a very fast pace, it won’t take long for this “Make Love Not Porn” to become boring. That’s just the nature of addiction. Shame on ABC for promoting more porn as the answer to porn addiction!

Again, Doidge sheds some light: “When pornographers boast that they are pushing the envelope by introducing new, harder themes, what they don’t say is that they must, because their customers are building up a tolerance to the content.” (Doidge, p. 105.)

A number of Doidge’s clients who were hooked on porn “reported increasing difficulty in being turned on by their actual sexual partners, spouses or girlfriends, though they still considered them objectively attractive. When I asked if this phenomenon had any relationship to viewing pornography, they answered that it initially helped them get more excited during sex but over time had the opposite effect.”

Let me end with some more clarity: Not only is porn a sick kind of fantasy; it erodes reality. It impacts the pleasure centers of the brain and alters them. Porn is the opposite of love. It isolates people and harms and destroys relationships.

Let us be clear with our kids: If they want a healthy, loving relationship as adults, they must avoid the lies and addictive nature of porn as kids.

By

Human Trafficking in America’s Backyard

January 24, 2014 · by Elisabeth Epstein

Human trafficking occurs in every corner of the globe from the southernmost foothills of Patagonia to the northernmost region of Siberia. Human trafficking is an egregious violation of human rights – one that often strips its victims of self-worth only to refill them with fear, isolation and desperation.

In the United States, a country most may not immediately associate with human trafficking, the U.S. Department of Justice ranks human trafficking as the second fastest growing criminal industry, behind only drug trafficking, with between 14,500 and 17,500 new people trafficked into America each year.

Every hour, 34 people in America are forced into prostitution. 

In 2013, human trafficking made national headlines when Ariel Castro was arrested (and eventually convicted) for kidnapping, raping, and forcibly locking three girls in his basement for a period spanning over ten years. One victim, Amanda Berry, even bore his child, thereby increasing the victim count to four.

As a result of the Castro case and several others like it, the movement to punish traffickers and to end human trafficking in the United States has been gaining speed.

Expanding on previous attempts to end human trafficking, on January 14th the United States government published its first ever Federal Strategic Action Plan on Services for Victims of Human Trafficking in the United States. The Action Plan aims to crack down on traffickers, develop a strategic action plan to strengthen victim services, and strengthen protections against human traffickers in federal contracts. Additionally, U.S. President Barack Obama proclaimed January as National Slavery and Human Trafficking Prevention Month. However, the federal government is not the only government entity taking a strong stance against human trafficking.

In August, Polaris Project, an organization dedicated to ending human trafficking in the United States, released its 2013 state ratings on human trafficking laws. In 2013 alone, 39 states passed anti-trafficking laws and 32 ranked in Polaris Project’s top Tier 1 category* – up from 21 states last year.

Over the past year, the momentum among advocates, legislators, and state officials to pass robust laws combatting human trafficking has been inspiring. We’ve witnessed a historic turning point now that all fifty states have passed laws criminalizing human trafficking. However, criminals are trafficking women, men, and children from coast to coast at horrendous rates. In every state, we need to give prosecutors and law enforcement the right tools to stop traffickers, and state agencies must have the ability to protect survivors and help them reclaim their freedom.” – Bradley Myles, CEO of Polaris Project.

Additionally, Polaris Project recently published the report, Human Trafficking Trends in the United States. In it, the organization reveals not only a rising number of human trafficking cases but also an increasing level of community awareness. For example, in the five-year period between 2008 and 2012, the National Trafficking Resource Center (NTRC) hotline received a 259%** increase in reports of human trafficking, a statistic undoubtedly due to the combined increase in cases as well as awareness.

Along with governing bodies and anti-trafficking organizations, the growing amount of national media attention also plays an important role in spreading awareness. For example, in August CNN profiled several victims to learn about their experiences in the sex trade; in December The Kansas City Star wrote a five-part series on human trafficking in America; and just a few days ago USA Today warned of high levels of sex trafficking during the Superbowl.

The Superbowl is the single largest human trafficking incident in the United States.” –  Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott

Even though human trafficking statistics in the United States remain at inexcusable levels, the good news is that awareness is on the rise – and awareness is always the first step.

If you are a victim or suspect a case of human trafficking, please call the NTRC at 1-888-373-7888 or text HELP or INFO to BeFree (233733) for support.

For more information, please visit:

Girls’ Globe Posts on Human Trafficking

GEMS Girls

Not for Sale

UNICEF

The US Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) Human Trafficking Program

US Department of Homeland Security’s Blue Campaign

*States in the top Tier 1 have passed “significant [anti-trafficking] laws” while states in the lowest tier, Tier 4, have made “minimal effort.”

**The NTRC hotline received 5,746 calls in 2008 and 20,650 in 2012.

By

Is It OK to Masturbate?

http://porntopurity.com/blog/2014/01/24/is-it-ok-to-masturbate/

Posted: 24 Jan 2014 03:00 AM PST

Masturbation is one of those hushed words in many church and family circles.  We don’t talk about it, we struggle with it, we are confused by it, yet we have important questions about it.

THE BIGGEST QUESTION:  Is it OK to masturbate?

I found an interesting article on www.restoringsexualpurity.org about masturbation.  Dr.  Harry W. Schaumburg shares some things to consider: CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL ARTICLE   Dr. Shaumburg comes to these conclusions in his article that are worth looking at.

  • Sex is a part of a personal relationship with another person; masturbation is non-relational.
  • Sex is to be exclusive; masturbation typically involves sexually impure thoughts.
  • Sex is to be special and intimate; masturbation is frequent and shallow.
  • Sex is to be fruitful (productive) in that man is designed to enter a woman and to create, both at a relational and reproductive level; masturbation treats sex like a commodity to be consumed.
  • Sex is to take place within the context of selfless love; masturbation is designed to satisfy oneself.
  • Sex is multi-dimensional; masturbation separates the physical from everything else.
  • Sex is to be complementary; masturbation is non-unitive.

NOW WHAT DO I DO? Many people spend a lot of energy building a case against masturbation.  That’s fine and it’s important.  But for those of us who want to be better and sexual pure… what do we do now?  Here are some tips to begin to break away from masturbation.

1.  Clean house – sometimes that stuff we have lying around the house (magazines, videos, music)  encourage lustful behavior.

2.  Find several healthy outlets for stress and emotions – Substitute a bad habit with a good habit.  Get to the gym, work outside, get busy with a project, go hang out with some buddies.  The TV and computer are probably not healthy outlets…find something else to relieve stress.

3.  You gotta talk to someone – A pastor, a Christian friend, a counselor…  If you really want to stop this, it needs to stop being a secret.

4.  Surrender to God – You may have done this time and time again, but you gotta let go and let God help you with the struggle.  Masturbation is a learned habit.  We are not powerful enough to stop it.  Invite God’s presence and power. There are many other things that will help like being part of a recovery group, reading recovery material, listening to recovery podcasts, but I want to give you one more big one…

5.  Get a notebook and write out your feelings and needs – Masturbation is a symptom of the undercurrent of emotions and unmet needs you have.  A notebook helps you talk it out, pray it out, vent it out.  Give it a try.  You’re not a sissy!  Get a notebook and work it out!

GET HELP FOR YOUR PURITY JOURNEY

Jeff Fisher helps guys with their purity journeys through:

  • Online / Phone Support Groups
  • Accountability Coaching
  • Personal Coaching
  • Speaking at Conferences

www.puritycoaching.com jeff@puritycoaching.com

By

Duty and Dignity

It is your duty to search for truth. It is everyone’s responsibility to seek what is right and just. Being mature enough to admit that you are wrong lend dignity to you. It also insures that you will remain open-minded about life.

1. Notice that you are upset when someone else doesn’t agree that you are right. This is the first step in the process. It is a simple awareness that you are in reaction.

2. Pause and allow yourself to see how crazy it is to be upset about who’s right. This is a simple task that requires that you give your ego a small time out. It is goofy to be that upset about whether people agree with you or not.

3. Don’t be angry that you are in reaction, but chalk it up to an opportunity to gain insight about yourself. Actually change the meaning of your reaction from something that is off base to an opportunity.

4. Forgive the other person for not having your “wonderful” insight. Hey, they have the freedom to believe what they want, just like you do.

5. Examine if you are possibly wrong. If by any remote possibility you believe that you are in reaction and wrong about it, please admit it.

6. Don’t expect them to love you just because you admitted you were wrong. Just admit it and see what happens.

That will help you get more real, more humble and will help your relationships deepen. There is great dignity in being able to admit when you are wrong. It is wonderful to be around that kind of person. By Louis Tartaglia, M.D. http://www.tartaglia.com/pages/admitting.html

“A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them.” – John C. Maxwell