CASTIMONIA

Sexual Purity Support & Recovery Group

co-dependency

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Father’s Day 2016 (Repost)

Originally posted Father’s Day 2012

In celebration of Father’s Day, I would like to tell you a short story about my father’s day 2008.  It was the first time I attended my current Church, The Fellowship at Cinco Ranch.  My wife and I dropped off our 10 month old baby girl in the nursery for the first time.  I was nervous and throughout the entire service, I was worried they would call one of our cell phones to tell us that she needed to be picked up from childcare!  To be honest, I don’t remember the content of the service (apologies to our family pastor who typically preaches on Mother’s and Father’s Day – Robert Jackman), I wish now I had.

When we went to pick up our daughter, I was overjoyed at how happy she was when we picked her up.  And then my “heart strings” were tugged!  The attendants in the nursery handed me a father’s day gift.  I looked at it and read it, and was so grateful for this gift that I made a decision that this was going to be the church for my family.  The nursery attendants took the time to place my daughter’s hand in paint and place her tiny hand print on a poem and frame the paper they used (see the photo to the side).  WOW!  My wife and I now work in the nursery with the infants and sometimes we can get overwhelmed with children, but the fact that these selfless people took time out of their stressed-out baby duty to do this for all the fathers was fantastic!

At the time, I did not realize that us visiting that father’s day and the poem were a “God Thing.”  As I look back at the last 4 years, I can obviously see that it definitely was.  It was less than a year later that I entered recovery for my sexual addiction and it was this church (more importantly the body of Christ – the members) that supported me in my recovery.  To be honest, up until I entered recovery, I was not involved in the church. I was one of those husbands, fathers, men that would come sit on Sunday mornings and let it go in one ear and out the other.  My biggest question after church was “what’s for lunch?”  I just was not invested in the church.

And then my life fell apart, and who was there to help me put things back together?  The body of Christ!  I began getting involved in church activities such as a couple of men’s Bible studies including one on Joseph, a Man of Integrity and Forgiveness (Swindoll).  It was during the study of Joseph where I confessed to having a sexual addiction.  I believe most of the men in the room were shocked and silent.  During the study on lesson 2, resisting temptation, I admitted my past sexual sin.  The funny thing is, after the study a couple of guys came up to me and also told me they struggled with about the same issues as I did.

From there, I took a Men’s Fraternity course, the Quest for Authentic Manhood that addressed a lot of my wounds growing up as well as showing me how the Bible defines manhood.  I continued on to various Christian studies and then in June 2010 I started the Castimonia Men’s Sexual Purity Support & Recovery Group, meeting for the first time on Saturday, June 12, 2010.

Had it not been for the experience at the nursery on father’s day of 2008, I don’t think I would be where I am today.  I pray all fathers in recovery have had similar experiences and that they can reflect on how God used the love of their children to draw them closer to Him.  And for fathers that are still living in sexual sin and need a reason to get out, I would like for you to look into the eyes of your children and understand that if you remain in that secret sexual sin, then there is a high probability your children too will inherit that sin or marry someone who has their own sexual sin.  Had I stayed in my addiction and kept it secret, I am certain that my daughters would have grown up to marry someone who carried the same character defects and same sexual secrets as I did.  Furthermore, if I had sons, it would be much worse for them as they would end up with some sort of intimacy disorder, such as sex addiction, if I had kept up my isolation and secrets.  So please seek help and step into the light, the path of recovery is not easy, but it is so much better than a life of sexual impurity.  It is a much better life for you, your wife, and especially your children!

Happy Father’s Day!

Take what you like and leave the rest.

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Monday Night Meeting at Lifepath Church Cancelled – 06/13/2016

We need to cancel the Monday night meeting of Castimonia at the Lifepath Church location only for this coming Monday night, June 13th.  The meeting will resume the following Monday night at its regular time and location.

For an alternate meeting, please visit our Katy Monday night meeting at The Fellowship.

Monday Nights
Time: 7:00PM – 8:30PM
Location: The Fellowship – Community Room
22765 Westheimer Parkway
Katy, TX  77450
281.395.3950

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To curb prostitution, punish those who buy sex rather than those who sell it

Originally posted at: https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/to-curb-prostitution-punish-those-who-buy-sex-rather-than-those-who-sell-it

By Jimmy Carter

Opinions

May 31

Jimmy Carter, the 39th president of the United States, is founder of the nonprofit Carter Center.

It is disturbing that some human rights and public health organizations are advocating the full legalization of the sex trade, including its most abusive aspects. I agree with Amnesty International, UNAIDS and other groups that say that those who sell sex acts should not be arrested or prosecuted, but I cannot support proposals to decriminalize buyers and pimps.

Some assert that this “profession” can be empowering and that legalizing and regulating all aspects of prostitution will mitigate the harm that accompanies it. But I cannot accept a policy prescription that codifies such a pernicious form of violence against women. Normalizing the act of buying sex also debases men by assuming that they are entitled to access women’s bodies for sexual gratification. If paying for sex is normalized, then every young boy will learn that women and girls are commodities to be bought and sold.

There is a much better policy option.

In my 2014 book “A Call to Action: Women, Religion, Violence and Power,” I described the approach known as the “Nordic model,” which is consistent with advancing human rights and healthy societies. Pioneered in Sweden and adopted most recently in Canada and France, this strategy involves decriminalizing prostituted women and offering them housing, job training and other services. Instead of penalizing the victims, however, the approach treats purchasing and profiting from sex acts as serious crimes. Another key component is public education about the inherent harms of prostitution for those whose bodies are sold.

In Sweden, demand for prostitution has fallen dramatically under this model. Conversely, Germany and New Zealand, which have legalized all aspects of prostitution, have seen an increase in sex trafficking and demand for sexual services.

Critics of the Nordic model assert that mature adults should be free to exchange money for sex. This argument ignores the power imbalance that defines the vast majority of sex-for-cash transactions, and it demeans the beauty of sexual relations when both parties are respected.

Sex between people who experience mutual enjoyment is a wonderful part of life. But when one party has power over another to demand sexual access, mutuality is extinguished, and the act becomes an expression of domination. As author and prostitution survivor Rachel Moran explained in her book, “Paid For,” once money has exchanged hands, a woman must deliver whatever service the customer demands.

In May 2015, when the Carter Center held a global summit to end sexual exploitation, sex-trade survivors, including Moran, described their painful journeys through exploitation. They told of the abuse they suffered — abuse that should be understood as torture. They expressed their determination to speak not only for themselves but also for those who are either too traumatized to come forward or who perished as a result of homicide, suicide, drug abuse or disease. They compare their movement to the abolition of slavery, an institution that once also seemed like a permanent fixture in society.

Prostitution is not the “oldest profession,” as the saying goes; it’s the oldest oppression.

Those survivors told us that they once believed that selling sex was their choice but that this attitude was a requirement for survival — that only once they were fully free from the fetters of the trade were they able to fully understand their lack of choice.

If full legalization is adopted, it will not be the “empowered sex worker” who will be the norm — it will be the millions of women and girls needed to fill the supply of bodies that an unlimited market of consumers will demand. Where do we think these young girls in the sex trade will come from? (Most victims are girls, though some boys are exploited, too.) It is simply naïve to oppose sex trafficking of children and women and at the same time support decriminalizing the buyers who create the demand and the pimps who profit from the supply of girls and women.

I believe it is better to help women and girls avoid a life of prostitution and to deter men from buying sex acts.

We must not abandon the equal dignity of each human being by simply regulating a form of abuse. There is a better way.

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Two Tennessee ministers, 30 others snared in prostitution, human trafficking sting

This is what is called hitting “rock bottom.”  I pray all these men find the help they need.

By Hayes Hickman of the Knoxville News Sentinel

May 20, 2016     

KNOXVILLE — Two local ministers face felony charges for seeking sex with underage girls during an undercover sting targeting human trafficking and prostitution this week, authorities said Friday.

Jason Evan Kennedy, 46, head of the children’s ministry at Grace Baptist Church of Knoxville, was one of two men charged with felony human trafficking and patronizing prostitution after they answered online advertisements specifically offering sex with an underage girl, the Tennessee Bureau of Investigation announced during a news conference.

Also charged with felony trafficking is Zubin Percy Parakh, 32, of Oak Ridge, who serves as creative pastor with Lifehouse Church in Oak Ridge, according to the church’s website.

In reality, the ads were placed by law enforcement as part of a four-day sting operation at a North Knoxville motel, deemed “Operation Someone Like Me,” conducted by the Tennessee Bureau of Investigation and the Knoxville Police Department.

Another 25 men who responded to the ads were cited for patronizing prostitution. They include a local engineer and a volunteer firefighter, whom authorities did not identify Friday.

“Human trafficking is a demand-driven crime,” said Kate Trudell, executive director of the Knoxville-based Community Coalition Against Human Trafficking.

“This crime is grossly protected by stereotypes that tell us it happens to certain people in certain places and many of us like to believe that those people and those places are not here in Knoxville, Tenn. But folks, unfortunately they are.”

Knoxville Police Chief David Rausch added that the problem has evolved from traditional circumstances involving prostitutes motivated by drug addiction to become much more coercive, and often involuntary.

“It’s not what used to be out there,” Rausch said. “Now what we know is it’s deeper and uglier than that. It’s people completely being taken advantage of.”

Traffickers use “a number of scripts” to manipulate girls and young women, the police chief said, preying on victims of child sexual abuse and teenage runaways, as well as drug addicts, with offers such as modeling jobs.

“There’s a number of ways they get tied into it,” Rausch said.

Five women also were arrested on prostitution charges — three of whom accepted authorities’ offer to help them leave sex work. There were no underage girls recovered during the Knoxville operation, nor were any traffickers arrested.

Kennedy and Parakh were charged with felony trafficking because they specifically sought out an underage girl for sex, authorities said.

Kennedy was arrested Thursday during the sting operation at the Best Western Knoxville Suites, 5317 Pratt Road, in North Knoxville, authorities said.

He remained jailed Friday in lieu of $50,500 bond.

According to arrest warrants, Kennedy responded via text Thursday to an online ad posted on ********.com offering sex with two females, including one he was told “was 15, going on 16.”

After arriving at the motel, Kennedy “state that he wanted to have sex with both the underage juvenile and the other female in the room,” the warrants state. “The defendant placed the agreed amount of $100 on the counter. The defendant removed his pants and was taken into custody by law enforcement.”

Kennedy, a married father of three, was responsible for ministry for the church’s children from birth through fifth grade, according to a cached page of the church’s website from Feb. 13, 2015.

The Southern Baptist Convention lists Grace Baptist Church, celebrating its 100th year this year, as having more than 4,000 members with an average attendance of almost 2,500 people. The affiliation of Baptist churches has resources online to help a church’s staff check the backgrounds of potential hires, but any background check will fall short if a person has no previous arrests.

“The children’s pastor of Grace Baptist Church has been terminated as (a) result of an arrest in a police sting related to prostitution and human trafficking,” according to a statement released by the church Friday afternoon.

“The actions of the children’s pastor for which he has been arrested were part of his life outside the church, and we have received no questions or concerns related to his conduct within the church or its ministries.

“The children’s pastor was hired two-and-a-half years ago. The church’s background check turned up no issues that indicate any previous problem. In fact, the children’s pastor in his application affirmed that he had no issues in his background of a criminal or other nature.

“We are praying for his family and will continue to provide the services of our ministry to them.”

Parakh initially was cited for patronizing prostitution and released. Authorities have since secured a warrant for his arrest on a charge of felony trafficking, although he had not yet been taken into custody, according to TBI spokeswoman Susan Niland.

According to the Lifehouse Church website, Parakh is originally from Chattanooga and is a longtime friend of Lead Pastor Jeremy Songer. The website says Parakh is gifted in music, media and technology.

A call to Lifehouse Church on Friday went unanswered.

The human trafficking charge is normally a Class B felony, however, authorities said they will seek to enhance it to a Class A felony because the sting operation took place within 1,000 feet of a church. Authorities did not identify the nearby church.

A Class B felony normally is punishable by a prison sentence of eight to 30 years and a $25,000 fine; a Class A felony is normally punishable by a prison sentence of 15 to 60 years and a $50,000 fine.

The Knoxville anti-trafficking operation was the fifth sting of its kind across the state in a crackdown on human trafficking by TBI and its partnering agencies, deemed “Operation Someone Like Me.”

“This is not just a Knoxville problem — this is a statewide problem,” said TBI Director Mark Gwyn.

Previous stings were conducted in Brentwood, Clarksville, Jackson and Chattanooga, resulting in 98 arrests and citations since May 2015.

Ads posted by undercover agents on ********.com during the Knoxville sting garnered more than 300 contacts, according to the TBI.

In one of the ads, agents posed as a juvenile girl. That ad received more than two-dozen responses.

More details as they develop online and in Saturday’s News Sentinel.

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Monday Night Meeting at The Fellowship Cancelled – 05/30/2016

In honor of Memorial Day, we have decided to cancel the Monday night meeting of Castimonia at The Fellowship location only.  The meeting will resume the following Monday night at its regular time and location.

For an alternate meeting, please visit the West Houston location at Lifepath Church.

Monday Nights
Time: 7:00PM – 8:30PM
Location: Lifepath Church – Room 108
17703 W Little York Rd
Houston, TX 77084
281.855.0222