How the mighty have fallen
I am at the top of the world; I have everything my heart desires,
why must I lust after more? I see her through her bathroom window, bathing. My heart starts racing, maybe I will be able to see just a little bit of nudity if she will just come out of the water some. I stand there, waiting; it seems like hours before I catch a glimpse. Now my heart is beating out of control, I am obsessing about this woman, my thoughts are going crazy, I can’t stop thinking about her nude body in the bath. I need to stop this insane thinking; it’s been so long since I felt this tremendous lust! I can’t stop, I won’t stop, I must have this woman!
I have my personal assistant research more about the condo across from this high-rise hotel building hosting our negotiations. What is this woman’s name? How can I get in touch with her? I can’t stop thinking about her; she is in my mind all the time! I have complete power, I can pay all the money I want to get the information I need, yes, that’s exactly what I’ll do. I’ll have my assistant pay the condo management company to find out this woman’s name and information.
How long must I wait for an answer? It feels like months have gone by, but really it’s only been a couple of days, right? What day is it today? It seems I’ve lost track of time because I have been obsessing about this woman. This can’t be healthy; maybe I should visit a doctor, therapist, or a psychiatrist? No, I am way too important to ask for help, much less ask for mental help for a sexual obsession!
A-HA! At last, I have her name! But she is married, how can I possibly ask to see her if she’s married? I know, I’ll ask her to come work for me, she can be here, close to me, so I can see her every day, that will cure my obsession, just having her in my presence. What’s the worst that can possibly happen?
She’s here! She’s here! Yes, send her in. My goodness, what a beautiful site, I can’t believe my eyes, my heart is racing, she is so sexually arousing, I want to be sexual with her, but I can’t, I mean, can I or can’t I? What am I thinking? This is insane, I want to hire this girl not have sex with her, no wait, I do want to have sex with her, but how can I do this and not lose my job with some sexual harassment lawsuit and sex scandal? My brain is spinning, I can’t think straight, my lust for this woman is overpowering.
I seduce her, she falls so easily to a man with such power and prestige, she is all mine and we have sex, right there in my office. However, when we finish, I feel so empty, I changed my mind, I don’t want this woman anymore, but maybe I do, I am undecided, so I ask her to leave. She is saddened but does not argue with me.
A couple of weeks later she calls, she tells me she’s pregnant. My heart sinks, what have I done, and what can I do now? Her husband is overseas in the military, how can I possibly cover this up? I know, I’ll ask my close friend the General to get this guy back stateside; after all I am the Commander in Chief. This plan will work, it has to work!
What do you mean he doesn’t want to leave his unit? He’s been given the opportunity of a lifetime! Doesn’t he know who I am? He has to come home, he has to have sex with his wife before she starts showing. He has to be the father of this woman’s baby; I can’t get wrapped up in this type of sex scandal. Get him home, do whatever it takes.
Fine, if he won’t come back home, then I need to take care of him. Maybe if there was an accident, like a friendly-fire incident or a recon operation behind enemy lines gone wrong? Yes, that is what I will do; I’ll send his unit on a top secret mission of utmost important. He will be part of a forlorn hope!
He’s dead, I’m so sorry your husband is dead, but out of the goodness of my heart I want you to move in with me, I will take care of you and your child. This sounds so insane in my mind, what’s wrong with this line of thinking? I don’t care, she’s mine, she’s all mine! We will live happily ever after.
Again, back at this dreaded hotel, but what is this I see across the way? Who is this new woman? I see her through her bathroom window, bathing…..
The above story was adapted from 2 Samuel 11 where King David displays his lack of self-control and acts like a sex addict; obsessed and going to the extent he does in order to sexually act out, and then the even more absurd extent he goes in order to cover up his immoral sexual activities. As someone in recovery, I can relate to the insanity involved in King David’s thinking, acting out sexually, and then trying to do whatever he could to cover it up. In looking at this story and my own life, I have to constantly remember the insanity involved in the addiction, and must always believe that a power greater than myself can restore me to sanity. Fortunately for King David he repented before the Lord. However, this act of sexual immorality cost King David greatly. He lost the son he bore with Bathsheba and his immorality carried on to his sons, Absolom, Amnon, and even Soloman. Such is the tragic life of a sex addict; lives in the addiction, hits rock bottom, and then enters recovery, but not after the damage has been done.
Take what you like and leave the rest.
