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September 28, 2025 By Castimonia

When God Doesn’t Answer: Trusting the One Who Already Gave Everything

Originally posted at: https://www.ourrelentlesspursuit.com/blog-3-1/when-god-doesnt-answer-trusting-the-one-who-already-gave-everything

Have you ever prayed for something so consistently, so earnestly, and for so long—only to feel like God has either missed your prayer, misunderstood your request, or somehow decided to answer it with… the exact opposite?

Welcome to the club.

We don’t have matching t-shirts (yet), but we do have tear-stained journals, well-worn Bibles, and a collective longing to make sense of what God is up to.

Waiting with Empty Hands

Recently, I found myself in yet another prayer session with God, presenting the same hope, the same need I’ve been bringing before Him for years. Not weeks. Not months. Years.

But instead of progress or breakthrough, I felt like I was standing in the middle of a spiritual construction zone—surrounded by detours, closed doors, and big signs that read: “Not yet.”

I whispered, “God, I’m still here. I still believe. But… are You even listening?”

Then, in the quiet, I sensed a whisper deep in my spirit. Not a booming voice from heaven, but that gentle, sacred nudge that only comes from the Holy Spirit:

“What if I never did anything else for you beyond giving you My Son?
Would I still be good to you?”

Whoa.

Cue the holy gut punch.

Let That Sink In

If God never did another thing for me—if He never answered that prayer the way I wanted, or in the timing I hoped—would He still be good?

And the answer, when I really sat with it, was humbling and clear.

Yes.

Yes, because He’s already proven His love in the most extravagant, irreversible way possible: by giving His Son for me.

“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
— Romans 5:8 (NIV)

We don’t have to wonder if God loves us. We don’t have to wait for Him to prove Himself.
He already did.

On a cross.
On a hill.
For you and for me.

The Vending Machine God That Doesn’t Exist

I think sometimes we treat God like a vending machine. We type in our selection—”B12: Healing,” “C9: Marriage Restoration,” or “A1: Financial Breakthrough”—and when what drops out is more like “E7: Character Development Through Crushing Disappointment,” we want our spiritual quarters back.

But God isn’t a vending machine.

He’s a loving Father. He’s not interested in quick fixes that leave us unchanged—He’s committed to eternal transformation.

He’s forming something in you during the wait that you wouldn’t develop if every prayer came wrapped in a Prime envelope, delivered overnight.

“The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;
it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the Lord.”
— Lamentations 3:25–26 (NIV)

Waiting feels like inactivity, but it’s often where our trust muscles grow the strongest.

The Parking Lot Analogy (Because, Why Not?)

Have you ever pulled into a crowded Target parking lot, said a quick prayer for a front-row spot, and immediately seen someone pulling out right in front of you?

Victory! God provides! 🙌

But then other times, you pray the same prayer… and you circle the lot twelve times, end up parking at the furthest corner, and get caught in the rain without your umbrella.

Where was God then?

The answer? Still good. Still with you.
Just less concerned with your parking convenience and more concerned with your perspective.

That parking lot moment is silly, but isn’t it such a metaphor for how we want life to go?

We want answers to line up neatly. We want the breakthrough to pull out in front of us and leave room for us to move forward with ease.

But sometimes the better lesson is found in the long walk back to the car, soaked, frustrated, but clinging to faith.

God isn’t absent. He’s just working in ways we don’t yet understand.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.”
— Proverbs 3:5–6 (NIV)

When the Answer is “Not Yet” or “No”

There’s a mysterious beauty in the fact that our faith is not built on results—it’s built on relationship.

Our trust in God doesn’t rest on what He gives us, but on who He is.

And He is:

  • Faithful
  • Loving
  • Present
  • Just
  • Wise
  • Kind

So what do we do in the meantime?

We worship while we wait.
We trust when we don’t understand.
We remember what He’s already done.

And more than anything, we cling to the cross—because that’s where His goodness was proved once and for all.

A Personal Word to You, Friend

If you’re in a season of asking and not seeing… of praying and not receiving… of hoping and not yet holding—
I see you.

But more importantly, God sees you.

He’s not punishing you. He’s not ignoring you.
He’s shaping something in you that’s more eternal than any temporary fix.

You can trust Him.
He’s already given you the very best—His Son.
And because of that, He will never withhold what is truly good for you.

“He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?”
— Romans 8:32 (NIV)

So today, let’s choose trust.
Not because we see the answer—but because we see the cross.

Let’s Keep Walking Together

If this encouraged your heart today, I’d love to stay connected.
👉 Subscribe below for weekly encouragement, scripture-based reflections, and emotional health tools to help you live a brave and beautiful life—rooted in Christ, not circumstances.

Let’s wait well together.

With hope,
Lisa

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, recovery, sexual purity

September 26, 2025 By Castimonia

Charlie Kirk on Overcoming Pornography Addiction & Protecting the Next Generation

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts, Videos Tagged With: addiction, christian, porn, pornography, recovery, sexual, sexual purity

September 24, 2025 By Castimonia

The Apostle Paul: 5 Secrets to Fighting Sexual Sin

originally posted at: https://www.covenanteyes.com/blog/apostle-pauls-secret-fighting-sexual-sin/

Luke Gilkerson

Luke Gilkerson has a BA in Philosophy and Religious Studies and an MA in Religion. He is the author of Your Brain on Porn and The Talk: 7 Lessons to Introduce Your Child to Biblical Sexuality. Luke and his wife Trisha blog at IntoxicatedOnLife.com

Hugh Hefner didn’t invent sexual sin. It is a problem that has been around since our ancestors walked east of Eden, and it will be around until the new Jerusalem descends upon us. The good news is that the Bible promises that we can experience foretastes of that coming freedom in the here and now. But how?

The Apostle Paul commands the Christians in Colossae, “Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry” (Colossians 3:5). But how do we do this? If we rip this verse away from the letter, we’re likely to apply it the wrong way, so we need to look closely to understand what Paul is talking about.

1. Fighting Sexual Sin Is Not About “Do More, Try Harder”

A dangerous philosophy was circulating in the church at Colossae. It was championing asceticism: If you want to remain pure, then separate yourself from the pleasures of the body that are so often a source of temptation. This philosophy said if you really want the fullness of divine life within you, then insulate your life.

But Paul delivers a crushing blow to this philosophy:

“If with Christ you died to the elemental spirits of the world, why, as if you were still alive in the world, do you submit to regulations—“Do not handle, Do not taste, Do not touch” (referring to things that all perish as they are used)—according to human precepts and teachings? These have indeed an appearance of wisdom in promoting self-made religion and asceticism and severity to the body, but they are of no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh” (Colossians 2:20-23).

No value. That is Paul’s verdict on asceticism. It simply doesn’t work. Yes, there is a grain of truth in the philosophy—all popular philosophies contain at least some wisdom in them. If you are tempted to sin sexually, then it makes sense to get away from sexual temptations. This will keep sin at bay—but ultimately the flesh remains unsatiated.

This false philosophy is still circulating in the church today. When the best advice we can give people is better filters, cold showers, more hours in prayer, and trying harder, we have given into this philosophy that Paul says is of no value.

This false philosophy either totally underestimates the power of sin or sets the benchmark of holiness too low. It either doesn’t get just how ingrained sexual sin is in us or thinks that merely getting rid of outward, blatant sexual sin is the goal. Neither is accurate.

Related: How to Be Free From Sin–The Higher Law Than “Try Harder”

2. Fighting Sexual Sin Starts With a New Identity

Paul offers his readers another approach to fighting sin, and it starts with these core identity statements:

  • “With Christ you died to the elemental spirits of the world” (2:20).
  • “You have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God” (3:3).
  • “You have been raised with Christ” (3:1).
  • “You were also raised with him through faith in the powerful working of God, who raised him from the dead” (2:12).
  • “You have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self” (3:9-10).
  • “The riches of the glory of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory” (1:27).

This is where a lot of modern readers check out. “Don’t give me these abstract theological ideas. I need something practical,” they think. But for Paul, there was nothing more practical, nothing more life-changing, than these ideas.

We are united to the risen Christ by faith. His resurrection life flows in our veins now. The Spirit of the living Christ lives inside us, so we no longer belong to this world and the rules it plays by—we belong to Christ and the age to come. In order to have the power to fight lust, we first have to understand this: we no longer belong to sin. We belong to God who has accepted us and forgiven us, not because we purified ourselves first, but because we are united by faith to the Pure One, Jesus Christ.

[Tweet “In order to fight lust, we must understand that we no longer belong to lust.”]

3. Fighting Sexual Sin Continues by Kindling New Desires

Knowing we are united to the living Christ, Paul writes, “Seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth” (3:1-2). The terms Paul uses here mean to center one’s interests, focus, and passions on something—to savor something. Now that God has united us to the risen Christ, we savor that reality, and this kindles new desires in us that displace a desire for sin.

What are these “things” above that we should savor?

  • First, we are to savor Christ himself. This is one of the reasons why Paul spills a lot of ink in this letter describing who Christ is. He is the beloved Son of God (1:13), the image of the invisible God (1:15), creator and sustainer of all things (1:16-17), the one whose blood reconciles us to the Father (1:20), the firstborn from the dead (1:18), and the one seated at God’s right hand (3:1). In him all the riches of wisdom and knowledge are hidden (2:3). The fullness of deity dwells in Him (1:19; 2:9).
  • Second, we are to savor our new position before God. Christ is seated at God’s right hand and we are seated with Him (Ephesians 2:6). To be seated at a ruler’s right hand meant to be in the position of greatest authority, honor, and delight. Because Christ is in us, we share in the favor He has with the Father.
  • Third, we are to savor the hope that someday we will see and experience these realities. Someday, Christ Himself will appear and we will appear with Him in glory (1:4). It is our destiny to be like the holy, pure Son of God. Some day our eyes will see the one who died for us and rose again, the one who is God in the flesh, and God will honor us as his royal children before every creature, every human soul, and every angelic being in the universe.

How does this practically help us to fight sexual sin? The reason why sexual sin can have such a grip on us is because of its power to define us and what is most valuable, how sexual pleasure makes us feel about ourselves. Sexual fantasy, pornography, or pursuing illicit sex makes us feel desired; it makes us feel valued and validated; it gives us a refuge; it gives us connection; it can even make us feel powerful. This is why setting our affections on things above is so important: It gives us a new center to our lives and gives us a completely new sense of value—not based on our worthiness but based on the love God has for Christ that overflows to us.

Related: What Is the Difference Between “Liking” and “Wanting” Porn?

4. Fighting Sexual Sin Is About Fighting for Our New Desires

Finally, we come to Colossians 3:5, “Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry.”

Paul here is not endorsing asceticism—something he has already refuted. Asceticism is about fighting to get rid of something we think is unholy, but mortifying sin is about fighting for the new affections that God is giving to us.

We can construct helpful boundaries in our lives that keep sexual sin out of reach, but we should do so by standing on our identity as God’s beloved children and standing satisfied in Christ and God’s love. When sexual temptation comes knocking, we can say to it, “No, sin. That’s not who I am anymore. You do not define what life is to me anymore. You do not define me anymore. Christ is in me. I am a child of the king, and one day the whole world will know it.”

5. Fighting Sexual Sin Is Sustained by Relationships That Remind Us of Our New Identity

“Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God” (Colossians 3:16).

This is the essence of real accountability in the body of Christ. Yes, accountability involves confessing our temptations, sins, and the state of our hearts, but it also involves godly encouragement. Accountability is not just about someone calling you out on your sin, but someone calling you up to the person you already are in Christ. Accountability is about surrounding yourself with the kind of Christian friendships that teach and admonish you, that inspire thankfulness, and that help us unpack all the wisdom contained in the great mystery that Paul called “Christ in us, the hope of glory” (1:27).

Accountability is like stoking the embers of a fire. It does not add energy to the embers. It only exposes those embers to the air so new reactions can happen. When we engage in the disciplines of confession, encouragement, and mutual prayer, we expose our souls again to the life-changing gospel, and God’s power is released again and again.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, pornography, recovery, sexual purity

September 20, 2025 By Castimonia

Twice in One Day

Originally posted at: http://www.theresstillhope.org

Jesus must have valued time alone. He withdrew to a place by himself – twice in the same day.

First, we read, “Jesus withdrew from that place” (Matthew 12:15). 

Just a few verses later, we read a follow-up. “That same day Jesus went out of the house and sat by the lake” (Matthew 13:1).

Psychologist Barbara Blatchley identifies several benefits of solitude. She says time alone heightens our creativity, deepens our spirituality, and replenishes us so we can make greater connections with others.

A 2019 study was conducted, in which 313 adults were asked about their time spent alone and with their social relationships. It was found that those who spend the most time in personal solitude have the strongest social relationships. 

Recovery Step: If you want better connections with others (a key component of recovery), take time to connect with yourself first.

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, recovery, sexual purity

September 12, 2025 By Castimonia

Freedom

originally posted at: http://www.theresstillhope.org

On July 4, 1776, the Second Continental Congress unanimously adopted the Declaration of Independence, severing the 13 American colonies’ political ties to Great Britain. The decree for freedom was actually made on July 2nd, with the passing of the Lee Resolution, which called for separation from the British Crown, foreign alliances, and a plan for confederation. However, the Declaration was not signed until July 4. 

Man has always treasured freedom. Go to any recovery meeting, and you’ll hear men and women talk about it. They want freedom, from their addiction, hurts, habits, and hang-ups. 

God is pro-freedom. “Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom” (2 Corinthians 3:17).

If you want freedom, chase after it. Seek it. Pray for it. Work for it. Never forget, freedom is a choice more than a condition.

Recovery Step: “We will not be free because we claim freedom, but because we practice freedom” (William Faulkner).

Filed Under: Sexual Purity Posts Tagged With: addiction, recovery, sexual purity

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This site is intended for individuals who struggle with maintaining sexual purity. This information is posted for individuals at various stages in their recovery, year 1 to year 30+; what applies to some, may not apply others. Spouses are encouraged to read this blog with the caveat that they may not agree with, understand, or know the reason for some items posted. As always, take what you like and leave the rest.

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