addiction

Terry Crews and his wife had a “90-day sex fast” to battle his pornography addiction. The 53-year-old actor – who has been open about his struggles in the past – revealed he and his wife Rebecca tackled the issues together and it made him feel like he was “12 years old again”.

He told ‘Entertainment Tonight’: “We did it together. Rebecca was right there and she actually regrouped with me.

“I went on a 90-day sex fast [with] her. And people were like, ‘Whoa, that’s crazy!’ But let me tell you something – what was so beautiful about that, was it took me to a time when I was 12 years old and I liked a girl and I didn’t know anything about sex.

The ‘Brooklyn Nine-Nine’ actor explained how he was nine years old when he was first “exposed to pornography”, and he kept his addiction a secret for two decades of marriage, admitting it “actually led to some infidelity”.

Although he resigned himself to never tell Rebecca whom he married in 1989 – he added: “But my wife knew something was wrong because we kept getting farther and farther apart. And when she addressed me and finally put the question to me, ‘What is it that I don’t know about you, Terry Crews?

Originally posted at: http://www.theresstillhope.org

A Swiss guy asked two Americans for directions. He asked, “Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?” 

The Americans responded with helpless stares.

The man gave it another try. “Excusez-moi, parlez vous Français?” 

Still no reply from the Americans.

“Parlare Italiano?” Still, no reply. “Hablan ustedes Espanol?” Still, nothing. 

The Swiss guy drove off in frustration. Then one American said to the other, “Maybe we should learn a foreign language.”

His friend responded, “Why? That guy knew four languages, and it didn’t do him any good.”

These two guys made the same mistake a lot of us make. We want to be understood more than we want to understand others. And that is a killer – of marriages, recovery, and life.

Recovery Step: Solomon said, “Fools find no pleasure in understanding, but delight in airing their own opinions” (Proverbs 18:2). Spend less time trying to be understood and more time trying to understand others.

Originally posted at: http://www.theresstillhope.org

We are all familiar with the metaphor about life that says we have all been “dealt a deck of cards.” You have to play the deck you’re dealt. You don’t get to play someone else’s hand.

In your deck were several jokers and wild cards, of which you had no control:

• Place of birth
• Generational sin
• Parental neglect
• Trauma
• Physical attributes
• Abuse

The key to recovery is not to ask for a new deck, but learning how to win with the deck you already have. The Bible says it like this: “A person who fears God deals responsibly with all of reality, not just a piece of it” (Ecclesiastes 7:18).

Recovery Step: It does no good to complain about your two of clubs. If you stick with the hand you have been dealt and stay in the game, you will eventually come out ahead.