By Keith B. @ NotUnknown.com
At the age of nine years old, I understood and accepted that God sent His son to die for me and redeem my sins. I began a journey on that day to know God. Unfortunately, that’s all I did. I began. I didn’t continue. God stayed where He was. Available to me and waiting. I got…sidetracked.
My contact with God wasn’t constant. God was like that neighbor who would knock and not go away, even when I wouldn’t answer the door. I could just feel Him peeking in the windows. So I went my own way, avoiding His gaze, trying to stay just out of reach.
My friend Sean and I were at breakfast one morning, drinking Denny’s outstanding coffee. We were talking about God and knowing Him. Sean held his hands apart.
“Buddy! God is here, and I am way over here. I am either moving toward Him or away
from Him. There is no inbetween!”
Sean speaks in exclamations. That is part of what I love about him. He also speaks from God. I love that about him even more.
Knowing God requires structure for me. Without it, I follow the sound of my own voice. My own voice has always eventually led to destruction. So, to purposefully know God, I put structure in my everyday life. For me, that started with how I make decisions.
What do you do when you are faced with a difficult decision? Maybe you are trying to decide whether you should look for another job. You don’t know whether or not you should stay in a marriage that doesn’t feel alive. Your parents health is declining and you don’t have any idea what to do. Do you have someone you can turn to for guidance? Is there someone you trust completely? Your mother? Brother? Spouse? Best friend?
What about the day to day stuff? Should I apologize to my wife for yelling at her when she started the whole fight by nagging me about the shirt I didn’t pick up and take to the laundry room? My daughter’s best friend stopped talking to her and sitting with her at lunch. Does anyone care about that or is that something you should just take care of on your own?
I found that in all decisions, big stuff and small stuff, my decision making stunk. I convinced myself I made great decisions. Only, when faced with the results of my decisions, I realized I didn’t.
Sean reminded me that God knew me in my mother’s womb, the number of hair’s on my head, the intimate parts of my life I felt too much shame to share with anyone else. And He never walked away. He waited for me to realize how much He wanted to be a part of all my decisions. To do that, I had to let Him into all my decisions. I had to learn how to move towards Him.
In my life I move towards God in a number of ways. I pray purposefully. My friend Lance recently talked about his day being a constant conversation with God about the big things and the little things. I do that. I read His word looking to know more about Him, not about me. Li-wei taught me how to read His word to seek who God says He is and what can I learn about His character. My friends Dan and Jay meet with me every Saturday, to do life together and to speak His word into each other. My wife Roxanne and I pray together for our marriage, our sons, the future, today, for big and small things.
Have you introduced purpose into your life? What are you actively doing to move towards God?
