CASTIMONIA

Sexual Purity Support & Recovery Group

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Hall and Oates helped me remember the problem….

ImageHall and Oates helped me remember the problem….
by Escape from Porn
Posted December 27, 2012

Shot this picture the other days while checking out at my local grocery store.  I knew I would use it in a post, but couldn’t formulate the words until just last night.  While driving home from a Christmas trip with my family I heard an old 80′s tune from Hall and Oats called, “Method of Modern Love”.  While I know what the song deals with, I instantly recalled my magazine cover.  As the world we live in becomes more and more pornified, there is more and more attention given to the mechanics of sex rather than the emotional intimacy side.  The world would have us master the art of “mind blowing” sex, rather than the art of communication and emotional intimacy and honesty.

In my recovery from daily viewing of porn and masturbation, I have found that striving to commit my thoughts and actions 100% to my spouse, the resulting levels of emotional intimacy are far more satisfying than the “EPIC SEX” the world would tell me I am missing out on.  Sex isn’t about the M-E-T-H-O-D but about honesty and communication.  The euphoria and resulting levels of physical intimacy I enjoy now are far more lasting than the temporary thrills and rush of dopamine I use to indulge in.  Pornography is a cheap counterfeit for the genuine love I feel now.

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Watching Porn Kills Masculinity

Watching Porn Kills Masculinity
http://intentionalwarriors.com/2012/12/11/watching-porn-kills-masculinity/

The New York Times recently ran this piece on the popularity of the Tough Mudder, an endurance race that combines running a certain distance with the challenge of overcoming very demanding obstacles.

The Tough Mudder forces participants to conquer countless obstacles which involve things such as low-level electrical shocks and endless cold mud.

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While women run these races, the majority of participants are men.  And often, they are men who have stressful corporate jobs which are far removed from the physical demands of life.

The races are overwhelmingly popular. According to the article, the organizers of the Tough Mudder will rake in $70 million this year.

So what is the relationship to pornography?

The connection is masculinity and the warrior nature.  The Tough Mudder is a testament to the warrior nature of men. The races thrive because men need to express their warrior nature.  They must have a battle to fight. They must be tested by a demanding situation or experience.

Pornography is a counterfeit masculine experience.

In the Tough Mudder, the true aspects of being a warrior are called forth through real challenges and legitimate obstacles.  Something is actually required of you and when you pass the test there is honest achievement.  Pornography is exactly the opposite.

Pornography makes you feel like a man without actually being one.  There is nothing in pornography that is a legitimate calling forth of masculinity or the warrior nature.

And yet, when you’re into porn you think it’s masculine. You think you are acting on the strength of the warrior within.

It’s a lie.

Porn emasculates men, makes them more passive than they already are — or makes them more out of control and destructive, depending on the man’s personality — and it give you a false sense of achievement and purpose.

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Codependency: A Family Perspective Part IV

Codependency: A Family Perspective Part IV

The following are statements which portray relationally addictive people(#8-18):

8. We may tend toward episodes of depression and/or anxiety. We try to forestall these episodes through the excitement of an emotionally unstable relationship or through addictive behaviors.
9. We are not attracted to a person who is kind, stable, reliable, and interested in us. We find “nice” people boring or unattractive.
10. We “stuff” our feelings and have lost the ability to identify or express what we feel.
11. We tend to become isolated from people and become afraid of authority figures.
12. We become approval seekers and lose our identity in the process.
13. We can’t stand it when people are angry at us. We hate criticism! We get defensive and “explain” ourselves in an attempt to show the other person how they are wrong.
14. Our world view is that of the victim. We sense and gravitate towards people whom we will allow ourselves to be victimized by.
15. We judge ourselves harshly. We use a more lenient yardstick to judge others.
16. We experience guilt when we stand up for ourselves. To avoid guilt, we give in to others.
17. We confuse love and empathy/pity and tend to think we “love” people we can pity and rescue.
18. We are reactors to life rather than creators of life.

From “Codependency: A Family Perspective” by Robin Norwood (list cont’d tomorrow)

“How much easier it is to be critical than to be correct.” – Benjamin Disraeli

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Codependency: A Family Perspective – Part II

Codependency: A Family Perspective – Part II
People suffering from drug or alcohol-related codependency disorders often experience themselves as being caught up in a treadmill existence. Whether or not goals are achieved there is a driven compulsion for more. An anxious feeling of incompleteness or emptiness remains no matter what is accomplished. Health problems may also exist: migraine headaches, gastrointestinal disturbances, colitis, ulcers, high blood pressure, and many other high stress-related physical illnesses. Stress related illness is not “only in your head.” It is stress-induced physical alteration of the body. It is real. Emotional problems such as depression, anxiety, insomnia, and hyperactivity may also be evident in codependent individuals. These disorders have a physical basis. They are chemical imbalances in the brain. In other words, our cognitive/emotional state impacts upon our physical being. We are a holistic mind-body system. Codependent individuals experienced a traumatically empty childhood. Their present-day relationships are empty. They attempt to use others, their mates, friends, and children, as their source of identity, self-esteem, value and well-being in an attempt to restore childhood emotional losses. Most codependent individuals are unaware that they are doing so. Having constructed a more idyllic existence, many codependent individuals are completely unaware that their childhood was troubled! From “Codependency: A Family Perspective” by Robin Norwood

“People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within.” – Ramona L. Anderson

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CORRECTION – Saturday Morning Meeting Location Change

I copied the wrong time in the previous announcement!  It should be 10AM not the previously written 7PM!


SATURDAY, September 7th – MEETING LOCATION CHANGE:

This change will only affect the Saturday, September 7th meeting.  It will return to it’s usual location on Saturday, September 14th.

Time: 10:00AM – 11:30AM
Location:
Grace Fellowship United Methodist Church
Mansion, Room 301
2655 South Mason Road
Katy, TX  77450
281.646.1903